Should teachers be able to send home notes to parents that touch on the more "intimate" aspects of a child's growth? Such as, you know, putting a sports bra or some deodorant on a young kid? That's the question asked by a mother on the Mouthy Housewives blog on The Huffington Post. Laments the mom:
My daughter is 9-years-old! I am NOT going to give her a complex about her teeny tiny boobs or a little bit of sweat. I don't think it is the teacher's place AT ALL to bring up bras and deodorant. In my opinion, it is a parenting issue.
Woah, hold up, lady! Let's go over the facts here before you send your braless child to school to stink up the classroom.
Your 9-year-old darling is spending eight hours or longer with people who are NOT YOU. You see your daughter when she wakes up, right after a bath or shower, and when she gets home, which is probably right before she bathes or showers. You aren't gonna get the full blast of middle-of-the-day or after-recess underarm perfume like her teachers and other students are.
Sorry, but a 9-year-old is not too young to be introduced to the rituals of womanhood -- not today, when girls are hitting puberty younger and younger. If your daughter gets her period at school and her teacher writes a note asking you to make sure that she has pads, are you going to squawk and cry, "Not my 9-year-old!" Hello?
Nobody is saying to teach your kid to be ashamed of her body. I don't think a bra (if needed) or a swipe of deodorant is any more encouraging a child to be ashamed of her body than is a good scrubbing with a bar of soap or flossing or brushing of teeth. It's basic hygiene and body care.
Additionally, the teacher who sent the note home to the touchy mom was pregnant -- which is WHY she suggested deodorant for those who might need it. Because she doesn't want to puke in the classroom if she gets nausceous from your child's aroma (which I'm sure charms your nose, but probably not everyone's). She's there to teach your kids. Get it?
Must we make everything tiny request into a big stink, parents? If your kid would be traumatized by a little deodorant, then I have no idea how he or she is going to get through the real trials and tribulations of life. Phew!
Should teachers be able to request that kid's put on deodorant?
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Comments 71
And seeing as how the teacher was pregnant, her sniffer may be a little more sensitive to odors. I know mine was!
When I was 9 I was in a training bra. Its not unnecessary for all kids, maybe she is an early bloomer. Maybe the kid was too embarassed to talk to mom about it because she knows how touchy mom is, and went to a guidance counselor instead. I don't know, not here to judge. Either way, I'd rather my kid's teacher send a note home to me before it becomes a problem than to have to console my daughter when she comes home crying that other kids are teasing her for being the smelly kid in class. Today's parents a pretty touchy sometimes.
So who is to say the teacher won't get sick of certain scents of deodorant? I know a few that made me squeamish!
That said, the teacher can totally write a note for ALL THE KIDS saying "This might be a good age to start talking about these things and demonstrating proper hygiene."
Here is my main problem with it: I don't wear deodorant most of the time. I've been doing my research, and various deodorants *may or may not* be linked to breast cancer. Cancers are a major problem in my family, so I rarely use it. Other than that, I use good hygiene, wipes with mild soap solutions on them, or a bit of baby powder/cornstarch to keep me dry. Nobody has ever complained to me about my "odor." I'd gladly start teaching DD my methods, but if it wasn't enough for the teacher, too bad. I'm not taking any chances with any cancers, period.
As for bras, I started developing early, and yes, you get teased. But, you get teased bra or not if you have early budding. Having the bras made me feel better, b/c nobody ever saw my actual boobs. And the bra smoothed them out so they were (not much) less noticeable.
That mom needs to SHUT UP! I'd rather a nice teacher told my daughter that its time for deodorant over some rude kid telling my daughter she stinks. The teacher did a good thing by saving this girl from getting bullies or judged because her mother obviously babies her and doesn't realize that her 9 year old needs to start wearing deordorant.
Kids are needing deodorant at ever-younger ages these days, a discreet note from the teacher is NOT the same thing as the teacher calling the kid out in front the class. This mother should get over it.
If you follow the link the email from the teacher was not specific to one student. Becuase of outdoor time the teacher sent an email out to all the parents (she sends emails weekly, how often is a teacher that involved) saying to dress kids appropriately for running outside and physical activing. So propper footwear shorts, jackets for cooler days, and " A supportive sports-bra if your girl is beginning to bud is a thoughtful gesture, and crystal/deodorant if they are beginning to perspire" she isn't demanding anything. This teacher is simply reminding parents of appropriate athletic attire, which may include a sports bra or deoderant (which might make kids feel more comfortable and not get teased for smelling like a locker room). The woman who wrote this is cray cray.
I think its rude. Just because someone is pregnant doesnt give them right to tell people they have to wear deodorant. Not everyone wears it, and I definitely think its unnecessary for little girls. Would she also ban certain foods at lunchtime or ask eveyone to brush their teeth afterwards? Also, asking a little girl to wear a bra is out of line. If a teacher told my daughter she needed one I would ask her why she was looking at her boobs. You would think a teacher of young kids would be able to handle little things like this. They are kids, not professionals.