Before you send your kid off to school, you try to instill a sense of respect for authority in our kids. But not too much. We want them to feel safe saying no when an adult wants them to do something that doesn't mesh with our values because we can't always be there to do it for them.
Take the third grader who was strip searched by his elementary school principal for allegedly stealing $20 from a classmate. It turns out Justin Cox didn't actually take the money, but that's beside the point. An adult made a 10-year-old boy strip down to his undies. And from the way his (rightfully) outraged mom is talking, it doesn't seem like little Justin knew he could say no ... and she wasn't there to do it for him.
That's the crux of my concern. I can't be with her all the time, but will my kid be able to say "no" to adults she was taught to respect?
Maybe the reason Clarinda Cox's complaint about her kid's school strip searching her son freaks me out more because she sounds so reasonable. She isn't one of those nutty parents who automatically says their kid was right. She says she would have strip searched him in the privacy of the school bathroom with a school staffer present so the poor 10-year-old wouldn't have been terrified.
She isn't saying no discipline. She's asking to be involved so she can speak for her kid. Makes sense, right?
It's not unreasonable for a school district to call in the parents of a child before they start a discipline process. That gives us the chance to work with the school in meting out punishment appropriately. It's not really that different from giving an adult criminal suspect a lawyer.
Kids these days face everything from strip searching to being locked in a scream room. That's why parents need to be brought in on discipline issues. We should have the chance to make sure discipline is appropriate, to make sure they're getting fair treatment. Because our kids don't always know when they can say, "No," but that doesn't mean they should have to suffer.
What would you do if your child's school called and said they wanted to do a strip search?
Image via Candie_N/Flickr
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Comments 19
I would say you DO NOT touch him, I am on my way. That is obsured that happened in a school or anywhere for a 10 y/o. We all wonder what is wrong with kids. This will harm this kid mentally and emotionally because that kid has to see the person who did this throughout school. I would be maaaad.
oh HELL no! They do NOT touch my child, or make them take off so much as their shoes! I would at that school so fast, they'd wonder if I was already in the building.
Under NO circumstances should any adult ever strip search a child! How on earth can anyone justify violating this young boy in order to find $20?
I'm curious why they thought searching other kids for stolen money would mean anything. Suppose the kid had $20 on him already? How could the prove it was a stolen 20 and not his to begin with? I seriously doubt the person who's money was stolen wrote down the serial numbers. At my school, whenever anyone reported stolen money, the school apologized but said they really can't trace or track money, unlike personal items.
Right on, Shandi80. It's confirmation that we made the right decision when deciding to homeschool.
Jeckyls-mommy, while you'll see if you read the constitution that such action is a clear violation of the fourth amendment, many school districts do have such policies and courts have held them to be legal. In fact, a literal reading of the fourth amendment shows that searching a person is never allowed. to wit, "The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized." Only a place may be searched. People may be seized (arrested), but nowhere in this amendment nor in the body of the Constitution itself, is the government given authority to search a person. Having said that, it is clear indeed that our government routinely violates the constitution.