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Do Our Children REALLY Feel Our Love?

by The Stir Bloggers on May 4, 2012 at 10:56 AM

Kelli Nelson is a mom who isn't afraid to talk about her feelings in her blog The Sweetness of Life. And we love her for it.

Who could resist a blogger who can make us both laugh and cry? Been there! Here is her blog below:

Do you ever wonder if your children feel your love? I mean really feel it. Often when I look at one of mine, I wonder if they can feel the swell of my heart at that moment.

Okay, so my 17 year-old scary-teenage-know-it-all son isn’t thinking about how I love him when I’m in his face about his lack of effort to complete calculus assignments.

And I’m certain her royal highness isn’t reveling in the strength of my love when I tire of her endless 4-year-old chatter and clinging for the day and tell her to leave me alone.

I’m a confessed indulgent mom. I give in easily. I’m tolerant, permissive, and usually quite agreeable with all the “I wants.” Sometimes I yell but I rarely discipline. And my kids are well aware.

More from The Stir: Loving the Husband More Than the Kids Is Key to Good Life

But can they feel the depth of my love? Do they feel the life-altering, earth-moving, unconditional love that’s so much greater than mere words?

I sometimes think about asking them. But I never do because I’m a coward. I’m afraid of the answers I might receive.

If I ask my son, he might remind me that I told him to fuck off at Disney a few months back. Or he might remind me of the day I shouted about his irresponsibility all the way to school and continued to shout through my open car window, as witnessed by a cadre of his interested peers.

If I ask my people-pleaser daughter, she might just tell me what I want to hear instead of what I want to know. Or she might remind me that I hid in the bathroom for an hour yesterday while she waited patiently for me to start her Tinkerbell DVD.

Then I remember how my son cried as a young boy if ever he saw me with tears. And how he demanded we sit in the same chair every evening after dinner as we giggled through Dexter’s Laboratory together. I remember how he never forgets to say, “Love you, Mom” each time he leaves the house to drive away on his own.

Then I remember how my daughter gets her Little Mermaid ice pack out of the freezer and holds it to the back of my head until her little fingers freeze each time I mention a headache. I remember that beautiful smile meant only for me as she runs out of her ballet class each week to jump into my arms.

So, my fellow cowards, the next time you wonder if your children really feel your love, come find me and together we’ll remember the little things our kids do to provide us with the answer.

Do you think your kids feel it?


Our series of mom bloggers we love runs throughout May in honor of Mother's Day. Click here to see them all.

Filed Under: girls, boys

Comments

19
  • the4m...
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    the4mutts

    May 4, 2012 at 11:28 AM
    You're right, this woman has a real talent for bringing out emotions. I like her :)
    As for the question at hand, yes, I think my kids feel it. They are utterly devoted to me. Quick to stand up for mom at even the HINT of a slight against me.
    Even my 2yr old will demand that people don't touch mommys car if they're standing next to it. *I have a strong emotional attachment to my car, that they're all aware of*
    Yes, even when they're evil little bastards, we never go to bed without "I love you" or come home without "I missed you"
  • MsRkg
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    MsRkg

    May 4, 2012 at 11:43 AM
    I think my son feels my love. Granted he is our only child, but he's quick to run to his dad or me and greet us with a big smile and hug and kiss as soon as he sees one of us. Or when were walking through the park, he'll pick a flower to give to me with a simple "love you" and continue on his merry way. When hubby is upset and frustrated with work, our son is quick to set up a star wars movie or something that hubby loves and put his favorite blanket on the couch for his dad so that he can lay back and relax and they can cuddle together. Its all in the little things that they do.
  • Eques...
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    EquestrianMom

    May 4, 2012 at 11:45 AM

    Thank you for this. I share custody of my son, and I always wonder if he truly loves me, or if he knows how dearly I love him. Specially when he's yelling that he hates me and wants his daddy because "Daddy loves me and lets me ride in the truck without my seatbelt!" so thank you for reminding me how I can look and see that my son knows I love him, and see that he loves me, not someday when hopefully he has survived to adulthood, but now :)


  • cherylam
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    cherylam

    May 4, 2012 at 12:00 PM

    my kids are grown, but I'm in their lives as much as they let me, but I too, wonder....do they know how much I love them?  Totally, without reservation, with my entire being?  I am afraid to ask too...


  • Lokis...
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    LokisMama

    May 4, 2012 at 12:06 PM
    Yes, I think they do. I work during the day and no matter how mad they get at me (Whether because I won't let them have a cookie, or what), they always ask for hugs and kisses before I leave and always come up to me with hugs and "welcome home, mommy!" when I get home for the night.
  • fredd...
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    freddiey03

    May 4, 2012 at 1:10 PM

    Beautiful piece of writing!! I often wonder the same thing, especially since my three year old is in the parroting stage. Really forces you to look at what you're doing. I don't know if they ever really know until they have their own children, when they expirence first hand, that feeling of being so full of love, you think you could just burst. I am so in love with my daughters sometimes it just amazes me.


  • Bertha21
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    Bertha21

    May 4, 2012 at 2:01 PM
    I agree with freddieyo3! I loved this!!!
  • CPN322
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    CPN322

    May 4, 2012 at 4:04 PM

    If you are a good mom, your kids feel it. My mother is absolutely amazing. Yes, shes has lost her patience with me and my siblings and has made mistakes, but I could never NOT feel her love. Sometimes, I think the only reason I've made it this far in life is because I know(almost) just how much she loves me. To all you moms out there doin the best you can and always remembering to tell your children you love them everyday, they feel it. 


  • Chris...
    -- Facebook comment from

    Christi Toms

    May 4, 2012 at 9:01 PM
    Nicely put!!!!
  • Katie
    -- Nonmember comment from

    Katie

    May 4, 2012 at 9:17 PM
    Yes, at least I hope my 17(almost 18) year old daughter does. She still calls me "mommy" or "momma", which I love. Tells me she loves me all the time. We had a "light bulb moment", as I call it, last night when she was asking me for my advice and then the next day, she said "Mom, you were right last night when you said....etc". I asked her if we could have a moment of silence to comemorate this moment when she actually told me I was right! LOL!!!! It is in these moments, which come few and far between, where we know we've done something right. Love it.
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