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Birthday Party Gone Wrong Shows You Can't Trust Other Adults With Your Kids

by Sasha Brown-Worsham on February 15, 2012 at 11:39 AM

My daughter has just now reached the age (she is 5) when people start asking her on play-dates that don't include me. So far, they've only been with other parents who I know very well and for a long time, but I know there is a time in the not-so-distant future when my daughter will want to play at someone's home and I won't know them. Scary!

This is why stories like this one where a dad accidentally put on his own porn instead of the Smurfs movie he had intended to show at a child's birthday party scare me to death.

If I were the parent of one of the kids at the birthday party, I would be livid, and this is a classic example of how hard it is to trust other people with your kids. This is why I have a plan.

My plan is multifaceted. First, I plan to BE the cool hangout pad. Oh yes, I will have all the Tang and cookies my kids could want. I will provide red paper for Valentine's and plenty of candy and fun. My house will be the place to be for kids after school.

My mom was the queen of this herself and I almost never went over to anyone else's house after school because she was so cool and all my friends wanted to be around MY mom. It's a genius plan, really.

My other plan is to really get to know parents of my kid's friends. This past January first, we invited one of my daughter's friends and her whole family up to my family lake house. We did skiing and snowshoeing and ice skating. At night, we put the kids to bed and we got to know the parents.

Now I consider them somewhat good friends of ours and it was really a very simple thing. The fact is, I want my daughter and son to make many, many good friends. But I also want to know the parents. I am never going to be comfortable sending my child over to a stranger's house. That would just not be me.

So I have to bake a lot of cookies, make my house super appealing, and be prepared to make a lot of new friends.

Do you trust other kids' parents?

 

Filed Under: activities

Comments

44
  • hs
    -- Nonmember comment from

    hs

    February 15, 2012 at 11:49 AM
    It could be your best friend in the whole wide world and something like putting in a porn video could have still happened. So "knowing" someone doesn't eliminate mishaps such as this as happening. On that note: my plan is the same as yours lol. My son is only 3 and already I can tell most parents love sending their child off so they can get some free time. Happens all the time in our neighborhood. As soon as parents see my son and I outside playing, all of a sudden their kids are released outside. So it should be pretty easy to accomplish.
  • the4m...
    --

    the4mutts

    February 15, 2012 at 12:01 PM
    Hell no I don't! I had a bday party for my now 4 yr old last Saturday. We got the first ever party bounce house *well, first in our house* I expected a few neighborhood kids to show up. Ones we knew.
    What I did NOT expect, was for a mother with 2 boys, and bbysitting a girl, to drive up, drop off all 3kids, and FUCKING LEAVE!!! Just leave! I've never seen these kids before, never seen the mother. The boys of hers, told her they knew other kids at the party, so she dropped and left. And left a kid that wasn't hers too.
    I was stuck feeding supervising and taking care of these kids for3 hrs. I finally sent them back to the boys house *2 blocks away, come to find out* and the mother was home, and never even came to check, introduce, nothing.
    If this is what passes for supervision of other ppls kids in me neighborhood, I say no way.
  • Loref...
    --

    Lorefield

    February 15, 2012 at 12:04 PM

    There are way scarier things to worry about than a few seconds of accidental pron...

    Is the scary part that the kids saw it, or that he has it on his computer? And what is really going to happen other than some embarassed explaination of what they saw?

     


  • Elise48
    --

    Elise48

    February 15, 2012 at 12:08 PM

    I clicked on the article & I don't even understand why that is news. Clearly just an embarrassing mistake for the dad.  Sheesh. Society is getting pretty sad these days.

    My son is only 1 1/2, so it hasn't really come up yet. But my plan when he's older is to be sure to at least meet the parents of his friends (you know, when I drop him off to play) and then give them the benefit of the doubt. Most parents are decent people, and I plan to treat them as such.


  • Rhond...
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    RhondaVeggie

    February 15, 2012 at 12:09 PM
    My son is six and this really came up for the first time this week. He was invited to a pool party for one of his classmates and the invitation included a note saying that parents have to pay if they want to stay. I've never even seen the parents let alone spoken to them. We are just not going, apart from the whole 'leave your kid with strangers or pay to stand by the pool' thing is only one of my issues with this party, but there is no way I would consider leaving him alone. Even if it were at their home or another facility I'd be there because they're total strangers.
  • Sierr...
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    SierraLynn

    February 15, 2012 at 12:11 PM
    I laughed when I read it. It's not a good thing, and not confining it at all. But that's funny. I wouldn't be all up in arms screaming ar how horrible those people are. It's an honest mistake. I highly doubt the dad did it intentionally. Nothing to be "scared to death of." Calm down.
  • i.hea...
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    i.heart.nerds

    February 15, 2012 at 12:23 PM
    So other parents are supposed to trust you and you will be able to guarantee that nothing bad or unexpected will ever happen? Yeah right.
  • the4m...
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    the4mutts

    February 15, 2012 at 12:38 PM
    I.heart.nerds. aparently bad parents do. Read my above post.
    That's the point. Good parents meet, get to know, and hope for the best. Bad parents drop off and expect strangers to care for strange kids.
    I don't think any of us expect perfection out of anyone caring for our kids, but we should expect to know the people, be notified of any incidents, and know that our kids are comfortable in this environment.
  • bills...
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    billsfan1104

    February 15, 2012 at 1:01 PM
    I hope other parents investigate you for everything, like you do them
  • tis.u...
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    tis.unnatural

    February 15, 2012 at 1:15 PM

    Wow, that's your idea of a scary event? It was an honest mistake and could have just as easily happened to parents that you know well. If it did, would you cut all ties to the parents for a simple mistake in which no one was even remotely hurt? Judgemental much?

    Better watch out; something like this could very easily happen to you one day, and if everyone was as judgemental as you, you'll probably loose a bunch of friends.


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