There is a trend right now to make very grown-up books in the format of children's books. First there was Go the F**k to Sleep, which was a big hit, then there was All My Friends Are Dead, That's Not Your Mommy Anymore: A Zombie Tale, and more. Naturally, it's no surprise that coloring books would follow.
The Big Coloring Book of Vaginas is definitely (definitely!) not a kids' book. But it's a book I would like to "share" with my daughter in some way. Now, at 5, I would never let her actually near this book since it's basically porn (the writer also has a Big Coloring Books of Co*ks as well and that one is definitely grown-up), but I love the concept.
The vagina book isn't about masturbation for men (unless you want it to be) and is much more about body empowerment. This is a lesson I want for my kids and for my daughter in particular.
The book encourages women to commune with their vagina, which sounds so silly to say (and what does it even mean?). But if you have ever been a mom to a boy baby (and I have for almost four years now), then you know that boys start "communing" with their penises from a young age.
We've had to actively train our son not to pull down his pants all the time and share his favorite thing in the world with the whole world. It makes us laugh how proud he is of his nether regions and most of the boy moms I know say their sons are the same. "Penis pride" is a real thing, people.
Girls, on the other hand, have no equivalent. Maybe it's because all of our workings are more on the inside, but my daughter doesn't run around feeling so excited about herself in the way my son does. I wish she did.
Obviously, I don't want her thinking other people are allowed to touch her or bother her, but that is kind of the point of body pride. It helps a person feel good and strong in their own skin and love what they have, not covet what someone else has. If you know your own body and you respect and love it, then you're far less likely to let someone else abuse it in any way.
Girls need the same body pride that boys have, but for boys it's instinct, something they innately know how to do and nearly all start feeling around 18 months or so. Girls have no equivalent.
The other day my daughter asked me why her brother was so happy about his penis. "He must just love being a boy," she said with a laugh. I laughed, too. But it made me a little sad. I want her to love being a girl, too. Though I would never in a million years buy her this book, I can think of many adult women who could use the boost and the idea is one I would like to impart to my daughter and myself.
Vagina pride could someday be just as real as penis pride, right? A girl can dream.
What do you think of this book?
Image via Amazon
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Comments 18
Not going to make my daughter color in pictures of vaginas to make her like her body. I think there are less weird ways to encourage girls to have a positive body image.
And btw, neither of my sons has "penis pride" *nor my daughters the equivelant* and I find the notion to be a bit silly. They love their entire bodies enough to know that its THEIR body, and not something that needs to be expressed to the world. Modesty goes hand in hand with pride. If your daughters had "vagina pride" in the manner that you described it, then she would probably learn at a young age to use it to get her way, because its such a wonderful vessel.
But, I'm no expert and that's just my humble opinion.
What??? Wha? O . my what in the world?
Uh...no. There are better ways to create a healthy self-image. Plus, I don't really want to foster the whole fascination with private parts. I'm fine with the kids acknowledging they have them and knowing what they're used for, but I do not support talking about them all the time or bringing too much attention to them. For one, I don't really want to get a call from the school saying they were expounding on how wonderful their private parts are. Or them doing it in public. Two, it puts too much emphasis on parts that aren't important except in copulation....which my preschoolers should not be thinking about. Accomplishments and personal attributes are much better ways to foster a sense of pride and self-image. Every woman has a vagina and every man a penis. Not everyone can win a spelling bee or get straight A's in school.
Um... I'll pass. I don't need to color vaginas to be comfortable with my body. My daughter will continue to color her Dora book.
Since when does "loving being a girl" have to have a sexual connotation? I never gave my vagina a thought until I was about 12 and my mom gave me the big finale to "the talk". I never needed to be shown pictures or to be taught to be proud of a body part. As a young teenager, even though sex was years away at that point, my mom encouraged me to familiarize myself with my body. She suggested that I use a hand mirror during or after a bath when I was all clean. Later, when more specific conversations were had about sex, she told me that the women who have the best sex life are those who are accepting of and comfortable with their own bodies. I remember she told me "How can you expect a man to know what you like if YOU don't know what you like?" She was never crude about it, just very matter of fact. Sex is natural. To make some big stinking deal about it with our daughters makes it seem more like something that should be whispered about in secret. My oldest daughter is now nearly 21 and my other daughter is 13. I have tried to follow my mom's example: "the talk" is not a one time event, but an ongoing conversation that started when they were in diapers and will be completed when I die.
MomofSCMJJA Excactly!!! my mom was the same and I have done the same with my girls .. except I try to always say "partner" instead of man because I am having some hunches about one of my kids..