Parenting

The Day Doesn't End When You Get Home From Work, For the Dads Who Don't Get It

ParentingPublished Jul 18, 2018
By CafeMom Contributor
DaDMuMDaDMuM

At what point does a working parent's day finish?

Whenever I get home from work it's always the same. I ask her about her day with the boys. She tells me a little bit whilst she's still getting stuff done. I use that as open license to talk about mine. She's usually cleaning the kitchen or still getting the kids ready for bed. Rarely do I ever get home and she's sitting down. Normally after a few seconds she cuts me off.

"Can you do the bottles?" or "Can you give Finn his medicine?"

I continue to talk and move over to perform the task as I go. I'm a pretty terrible house worker at the best of times, so when I talk I become agonizingly slow for her to watch. You can literally see her twitching as I use the wrong sponge or turn on an already boiled kettle.

A few moments later she cuts me off again.

"Knox needs a singlet under his shirt."

I keep going at the same pace and keep talking. Eventually it gets to a point where she snaps.

"Brad, can you just help me?!"

DaDMuM
DaDMuM

"Calm down hun, I'm doing it."

"Well babe, I'm tired ... I just want to get them down so I can get some stuff done and go to sleep."

I normally reply, "Fine" -- or something equally short. It sets a sh*tty tone for the next little period.

That's the bit that gets us. It's the bit where she wanted me to just shut up and help. The bit where I ridiculed her reaction and insinuated she was snapping at me for no reason. It's the bit where our separate days failed to become one. She was only being polite by asking about my day.

I think back to the days when I'm at home with the boys and she gets home. It's like a saving grace. She normally walks in the door and says, "Where are we up to?" We get sh*t done and then we sit down and talk after.

If I got home and she was loading wood into a trailer; I'd probably help without needing to be asked or reminded to keep going. But for some reason I have a different attitude toward housework. I normally think, "It can wait till later tonight."

We just need to remember that our partners at home don't have a set finish time like us.

For as long as there's washing in the basket, rubbish in the bin and dishes in the sink, her day isn't finished. And while she's still working, she certainly doesn't want to hear about my day.

So, next time you get home from work ... show her you love her -- and let her know your day isn't finished either.

This post was written by Brad Kearns and was reprinted with permission.

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