This Mom's Embarrassing Story About Farting in Yoga Class Is Way Too Real

Laura Mazza

Laura Mazza, a Melbourne, Australia–based mom of two who writes the blog Mum on the Run, is pretty forthcoming about the more cringeworthy, occasionally mortifying side of birth and motherhood. But her latest confession -- involving what she tried to do to heal her abdominal wall following two pregnancies -- has the whole Internet in a laugh-'til-you-cry uproar. Mazza took to Facebook yesterday to share a selfie alongside a story about farting in her first yoga class. The post is, as one commenter put it, "so flippin' real" that it's no surprise it has already garnered nearly 4,000 comments and 7,500 reactions.


"Having kids separated my abdominal wall like Moses parting the Red Sea," Mazza wrote in her post. "Yeah it's not good and my stomach kinda points out like a cone. So you know, I am trying to get fitter and fix it so was suggested by a [doctor] to try yoga."

Hilariously documenting how self-conscious she felt getting ready for and set up in her first class, Mazza revealed, "I'm thinking, holy s--t, this is real yoga, not like 5,6,7,8 and stretccchh. Everyone's taking off their socks and I'm thinking oh lord, my toes are hairy and I didn't shave them, I only dry shaved my ankles in case my pants ride up." Ha, OMG. And it only got even worse from there.

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"For the past few weeks I have had IBS symptoms like something crazy," she shared. "My farts stink like something mixed between a rotten egg and an incineration plant. And somewhere between the dolphin position and the three legged dog, two of those burning garbage eggs slip out and I fart. I farted. I farted at yoga. I'm a walking cliche. My pelvic floor has failed me."

Poor mama!

Mum on the Run
Laura Mazza - Mum on the Run/Facebook

She thought the moment had passed, but then, when her instructor was correcting her form, another fart hit, and Mazza was just ... done. As she wrote in her post:

"We go down on this position where we stretch out but our legs are like a frog on the floor. The teacher then came around and pushed everyone down lower ... I thought oh good, gonna get a nice crack in my back again. I hold in my butthole nice and tight to make sure no farts escape again. She comes over ... pushes my back down ... And buuuuuuuuuurrppppfffffff The loudest trumpet comes out of my ass. I froze and thought oh my god. Oh my god."

She chucked her yoga mat to the side and did her best to get out of there as fast as she could. As the yoga instructor said "namaste," Mazza said she thought, "Nah I'm a go." Bhahaha! Wow. "And I run out the door and now I'm sitting at McDonald's eating a sundae crying and laughing," she explained. 

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The bottom line? "I'm never ever ever EVER, doing yoga again," Mazza concluded. "F--k the muscle separation."

Bravo to her for being so damn honest about this outrageously embarrassing moment! And for being real with herself about what she's actually willing to do to heal up. Ain't no shame, mama. You do you!

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