This Mom Had the Best Response When Her Daughter Called Her Fat

Allison Kimmey and daughter

It's damn hard to walk by a mirror without checking to see if a hair is out of place or if your "food baby" from lunch is showing. Our society is hyper-focused on physical appearance, which can make even the most confident of us feel less-than. Sadly, our children are often bombarded with the same BS messages about how bodies are supposed to look, making them both targets and sponges for the very rhetoric we try so hard to fight. When Allison Kimmey's daughter called her fat out of anger, this awesome mom delivered the perfect response that's a lesson for us all.


Kimmey, a self-help author and speaker, shared her teachable moment on Instagram.

"My daughter called me fat today," the mom writes. "She was upset I made them [her and her brother] get out of the pool and she told her brother that mama is fat. I told her to meet me upstairs so we could chat."

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"'What did you say about me?'" Kimmey says she asked her daughter.

Obviously, Allison's "what did you just call me?" showdown could've ended in her scolding her daughter, taking offense to her precious child's use of the "F-word," running off to cry in private, or a mix of the three.

But rather than take her daughter's words as a stinging insult, this mom decided to take a different route that's full of body positivity and a mother's determination to change her children's mindset for the better.

Allison Kimmey with daughter at the beach

Kimmey writes that this is what she told her daughter:

"The truth is, I am not fat. No one IS fat. It's not something you can BE. But I do HAVE fat. We ALL have fat. It protects our muscles and our bones and keeps our bodies going by providing us energy ... everyone, every single person in the world has fat. But each of us has different amounts ... Some people have a lot, and others don't have very much. But that doesn't mean that one person is better than the other."

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Yes, Allison, yes! Too many of us have lived our lives in a comfortably miserable state due to the labels we allow society to project on us, making terms like "fat" -- an adjective we overuse in passing -- define us instead of focusing on who we are inside.

Too often, little girls grow up basing their self-worth on the amount of skin they can pinch on the sides of their stomachs, or young boys are taught that rippling muscles define manhood. The sad reality is children can begin to experience body image issues as young as age 8. That makes every mom's quest to change how our children view and love their bodies a never-ending battle. But it's one we can win by planting the right seeds -- with one of those seeds being how we treat the word "fat."

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"Fat is not a bad word in our house," Kimmey writes in her Instagram post. "If I shame my children for saying it then I am proving that it is an insulting word and I continue the stigma that being fat is unworthy, gross, comical and undesirable."

Allison Kimmey with daughter at the beach

Our children are constantly watching us -- often mimicking our very actions and words. And if we want them to have fighting chance in a world that defines your value based on how much you weigh, as Allison says, "it is our job to continue to be the loudest, most accepting, positive and CONSISTENT voice they hear -- [so] that [they] can rise above the rest."

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