17 Moms Confess How They Knew They Were Done Having Kids

Liz Alterman | Jun 1, 2017 Being a Mom
17 Moms Confess How They Knew They Were Done Having Kids
Image: CREATISTA/Shutterstock

Mom with kids

Some women rejoice at the thought of having a large family, while others are happy to say "one and done!" But how do you know when your family is complete? We asked moms in the CafeMom community and beyond to share when they knew they were done having kids. Remember, the only person who can decide what the right number of kids is for her family is the mom. It can be hard to take tell people that bigger is not always better. While some were beyond ready to say good-bye to diapers, others, sadly, had their decisions made for them due to medical and fertility issues. No matter what, these moms made decisions that were right for them, not based on what others thought was right. 

Pregnancy is personal. And honestly, so is each and every mother's parenting journey. While some of us are perfectly content with the "one and done" plan, other moms are huge fans of having a large family, and the sky is the limit when it comes to how many children they'd like to have. But isn't that what is so wonderful about parenthood? We all have our own preferences for what our ideal families look like, and our differences make us individual and unique.

Take a look at some of the responses these moms shared and see if any align with your own thoughts about family. 

  • Finances

    couple working on budget
    Wayhome studio/Shutterstock

    "[We knew we were done having kids] when we had to actually budget our money for formula. That's it." -- Anonymous

    More from CafeMom: 6 Money Matters You Should Handle Before Baby Arrives

  • Surprise: It's Twins!

    Katrina Elena/Shutterstock

    "I originally said I would have one and done. I ended up with twins. So I'm super done now. I didn't want a whole slew of kids. I wanted one (but I'm happy with two) that I can focus my time and energy on." -- CafeMom community member StephD710

    More from CafeMom: First Poop After Baby: 12 Moms Share Their Terrifying Tales

  • Postpartum Depression

    mom with depression
    Tolikoff Photography/Shutterstock

    "I knew I was done having kids two days after I got home from the hospital and was hit with severe postpartum depression for almost a year. Even when I got better, I knew I only wanted one.

    "Surviving PPD made me so self-aware and taught me so many valuable lessons, including knowing my limitations. I decided that giving my son (and husband) a happy, healthy mommy was more important than a sibling." -- Jen Schwartz, founder of the blog The Medicated Mommy

  • Tough Labor

    mom and newborn
    Natalia Deriabina/Shutterstock

    "I wanted five but almost died having the fourth, so I was forced to be done." -- Anonymous

    More from CafeMom: The Outrageous Reason More and More Women Are Dying After Childbirth

  • My Body Decided for Me

    woman with pregnancy test

    "My body won't get pregnant anymore. I have been tested and they have no clue why all the sudden I can't seem to get pregnant. Only thing my doctor can say is maybe it's because I'm starting menopause but who knows. We wanted one more. As time goes, I'm getting older and ready to be done now." -- CafeMom community member Raeann11

  • Right From the Start

    tired pregnant woman

    "I knew when I was pregnant with my first that I didn't want to get pregnant again." -- CafeMom community member PinkButterfly66

    More from CafeMom: Big Love & Hormones: 12 Women Share The First Time Motherhood Made Them Cry

  • Diaper Duty

    woman holding nose and dirty diaper
    Diego Cervo/Shutterstock

    "Once my twins were potty trained and I babysat my friend's daughter who was a year younger than my twins, I knew right then and there that I didn't want any more kids ... I liked that I didn't have to change diapers anymore. Haha." -- CafeMom community member M4LG5

  • Friends' Advice

    moms at playgroup

    "I knew I was done having kids when two of my friends had their third child within six months of each other, and both said, 'Stop after two! Take our advice!' I got the same advice from my aunt: 'After two, you're outnumbered. You might as well have six if you're gonna have three.'" -- Kenna C.

  • Single Mom

    three kids and mom
    Jandrie Lombard/Shutterstock

    "I was single and had three kids and didn't think I would ever meet anyone and so circumstances decided for me." -- CafeMom community member MysticLove

  • Four Is a Lot to Juggle

    mom of four kids

    "I'm done. I just had my fourth baby on the 11th. I always wanted kids but never really decided how many. I did know I always wanted a boy and a girl. I have two of each but what [made] me know I was done was that mentally and emotionally I know I can't handle any more children." -- CafeMom community member Rachel216

    More from CafeMom: Dad Shares Epic Toddler Poop Disaster Straight From Our Nightmares

  • When You Can Look at a Baby ... & Not Want One

    Women and baby

    "As soon as you can look at a baby, and go 'Aw, cute, glad it's not me,' you are done!!!!!" -- Anonymous

  • Multiple Miscarriages

    sad woman

    "I have one son. I lost three to miscarriage. I have never felt done, after my last [miscarriage] I never got pregnant. I am 53 and still hoping." -- Robin-Christine

  • Painful Labor

    woman in labor
    In the Light Photography/Shutterstock

    "When I was in labor with my third I turned to my husband and said: 'No more!' I have had no desire to have any more." -- CafeMom community member left.drowning

  • Bad Medical News

    woman with doctor
    Rocketclips, Inc./Shutterstock

    "[I knew I was done] when the doctor said, 'The next pregnancy could go okay or it could kill you. I don't recommend you trying to get pregnant again.'" -- CafeMom community member Momtoone07

    More from CafeMom: 8 Universal Laws of Parenting That Are More Reliable Than Gravity

  • Son With Special Needs

    Boy on iPhone

    "My son was diagnosed with autism when my daughter was 6 months old. That pretty much sealed the deal on more children. He would have been an only child if I would have known sooner."  -- CafeMom community member The Lady Amalthea

  • Got the Boy, Got the Girl

    happy family
    Monkey Business Images/Shutterstock

    "My husband and I talked about it before we were married. We said if we got two girls or two boys, we'd try one more time for the opposite gender, but after three, we were done, regardless. If we got one boy and one girl, we were done at two. Our first was a boy, and during my second pregnancy, I decided I never wanted to be pregnant again, regardless of what the second one was, and my husband agreed with me. Luckily, our second was a girl, so we got the one boy, one girl we wanted." -- Anonymous 

  • Hubby Said So!

    mom with kids

    "My husband told me [we were done having kids], lol. We agreed on three and had three. I want a fourth but he's not convinced. I'm working on it. I'll never feel done. I'll always want more babies but accept that's not reality, so I live with it." -- Anonymous 

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