Badass Breastfeeding Mom Reminds Us We're All Queens No Matter How We Feed Our Babies

Blogger Constance Hall keeps it real about breastfeeding struggles

When you're pregnant, everyone -- including their mama -- loves to give you advice on what to expect while you're expecting. And sometimes, you may get a few nuggets about the "D-Day" known as labor and delivery. But, you know something? Not too many people tell you about what happens after you deliver, which is why blogger Constance Hall's hilarious breastfeeding struggle post is a must-read.


"Breast feeding ain't always glamorous and it certainly isn't easy."

Mmhmm. Three snaps and a hallelluj to that!

The 32-year-old mom of four did not mince words with her Facebook post, and my, is it a breath of fresh air for someone to keep it real! Like many new moms, Constance was all sorts of excited at the idea of breastfeeding her first child ... until she had to do it.

I wasn't expecting the royal fucking let down that for me was crying through the pain of bleeding, cracked nipples being sucked on innocently by a baby who was actually causing me unthinkable agony. A sweaty dread locked ponytail and a mild stench of sour milk, it wasn't pretty.

Babies don't all come out suckling, some need to be taught, teaching a baby to feed is hard and frustrating.

And then, three more kids followed, including twins, who Constance tried to breast feed.


Oh look, I found one of my glamour shots. Breast feeding glam ���

A photo posted by constanceandtribe (@mrsconstancehall) on

More from The Stir: 15 Memes That Capture the Hilarity That is Breastfeeding

Mom was soon faced with a decision: Breastfeed and express milk when needed, or keep your sanity by using formula from time to time.

Hey, no judgments here, Constance.

Expressing milk can pretty much just go and fuck itself, 3 of my babies have been over 5 weeks prem, a lot of expressing involved in premmie babies. I now have a rule, if I need to pump I'm switching to formula, nothing is worth the ordeal. A nipple that is being sucked through a breast pump looks kind of related to the image of a kid blowing his mouth against a window that you are on the other side of.. It's just squashed and wrong. When someone pops over unannounced and your pumping you actually feel around with your free hand for something to throw at them.

The twins "self weaned" at 6 months old. Probably because I was giving them formula most of the time anyway..


OMG, I love this woman. Personally, I think you need moms like this in your #Squad who aren't afraid to tell it like it is. In a world where everyone tries to keep things cute, you have to applaud those willing to lower the veil -- who have no shame admitting things aren't perfect.

I love Constance's message: that all moms are queens, regardless of how they feed their child. Giving breastfeeding a try, she wants mommies who didn't continue -- or couldn't breastfeed at all -- to know the bond between mom and child doesn't require a mandatory boob in baby's mouth.

More from The Stir: 6 Reasons I Hate Breastfeeding & Would Never Do It Again

As Constance says:

Did my bond with them change?
No way, It strengthened. My bond with all of my children has strengthened as I have felt calmer, more relaxed, better rested and with the twins, that relaxation came in the form of formula.

Don't ever consider yourself failing at breast feeding. Queens don't fail.
Some continue, some change their minds, some never wanted to and some have no choice.

But none of them fail.

Baby is fed? Queenie's a success.

As a breastfeeding mother, I can relate to many of these struggles. Those first few days, man ... yeah, not so much fun. Even with a lactation consultant, there's no guarantee things will go according to plan.

At the end of the day, you have to do what's best for you and baby -- and if that means breast, cool. If not, you aren't a horrible mom!



Image via Constance Hall/Facebook

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