6 Ways Babies Live the Good Life (and Moms ... Not So Much)

Aimee Ogden | Jul 22, 2015 Being a Mom

Your baby had a luxurious tea trea oil bath today (with a follow-up massage) and you... you can't even remember the last time you showered. We're so hyperfocused on giving our babies the best of the best that sometimes our own wants and needs tend to fall by the wayside. Sound familiar?

When a new mom actually finds a few moments to catch her breath, look at her organic-cotton swaddled napping baby, and think, it probably occurs to her: man, this baby has it good. Much better, in fact, than Mom herself has it. (Nap? What nap?) Let's take a look at all the ways babies make out like bandits compared to Mom.

How have you made room for 'me time' with a new baby on your hands?


Image © Christopher Futcher / iStock

  • Baby eats like a Kardashian-West

    1

    Image © tycoon751 / iStock

    When it comes to food, nothing's too good for baby. Homemade? Check. Locally sourced? You got it. Nutritious and delicious? Of course -- even if it's going to end up splattered on the kitchen wall.

  • Mom eats like like a ... (wait, did I eat?)

    2

    Image © Lester Balajadia / Shutterstock

    When (or if) Mom remembers to eat, it's not quite the same standard of fare baby gets, unless she licks it off the high chair tray during cleanup. Shoveling expired yogurt in your face while standing over the kitchen sink is almost as good as apple-and-lentil patties with whole grain rice and fresh asparagus ... right?

  • Baby's constantly entertained

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    Image © RobHainer / iStock

    Is there a learning toy or board book out there that baby doesn't own? Probably not. Baby has a fun, entertaining schedule that includes plenty of tummy time, play gym time and swing time -- but never too much of any of them. Plus, Mom is on hand to dance, sing, and generally humiliate herself in order to make him laugh.

  • Mom forgot what entertainment is.

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    Image © FotoSpeedy / iStock

    What's not as sweet: falling asleep twenty minutes into whatever show you've pulled up on Netflix? Or the fact that 20 minutes of mindless TV and then an impromptu nap feels like the pinnacle of entertainment to you right now?

    More from The Stir: Binge-Watching TV Is Ruining My Life & Probably Yours Too

  • Baby's a fashionista

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    Image © numbeos / iStock

    Baby never leaves the house without being dressed in a perfectly matched (and perfectly adorable) outfit -- and there are three extra changes of clothes in the diaper bag, each in their own Ziploc baggie, just in case there's a major diaper blowout or sippy cup fiasco.

  • Mom lives in yoga pants

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    Image © wengewood / iStock

    Does Mom even own anything without bodily fluid stains on it? Put on that favorite well-worn pair of yoga pants -- at least they're black and will hide most of the boogers and sticky-fingered smears.

  • Baby's drinks are always at the right temperature

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    Image © FamVeld / iStock

    Ahhhh: either breast milk straight from the source, or a bottle perfectly warmed to the right temperature -- not too hot to scald, not too cold to upset a tiny tummy. So refreshing!

  • Mom never sits down to a hot cup of coffee

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    Image © miss_elli / iStock

    Did you make this cup of coffee earlier this morning, or yesterday? Does it even matter anymore? Lukewarm or not, at least it's still coffee ... right?

    More from The Stir: 6 Things Only a Coffee Addict Can Understand

  • Baby's wheels are top of the line

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    Image © MichaelSvoboda / iStock

    Baby's got the latest, greatest stroller model, with liquid-proof high-tech fabric, multiple cup holders, a retractable visor, and more storage compartments than a U-Haul facility. It's a super stylish ride!

  • Mom drives the vehicle she always swore she wouldn't

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    Image © Photoservice / iStock

    Other than the sheer amount of stuff -- and people -- you can cram inside, there is very little that's cool about a mini-van. Especially not a mini-van with granola bar wrappers on the floor and a forgotten wet diaper wasting away somewhere behind the back seat. This was never Mom's dream but it is her reality. And somehow, she's okay with it.

  • Baby sleeps like ... well, a baby.

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    Image © Goldmund Lukic / iStock

    It must be nice to spend 3/4 of your life carefully swaddled up and snugly sleeping, with a fresh, clean crib sheet and gentle white noise to ease your way into slumberland.

  • Mom obsesses about sleeping but rarely does it

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    Image © PeopleImages / iStock

    "Sleep when the baby sleeps" only works if you plan to completely stop eating, cleaning, and doing laundry -- all of which seem like fairly important things. When Mom finally does get half an hour for some shut-eye, chances are good that a stray squawk from the baby monitor will have her up and heart pounding within a few minutes of her dozing off. Don't worry, new mom, sip that day-old coffee and take comfort in knowing you'll get plenty of rest in, um, a few years.

    More from The Stir: Your Baby Finally Sleeps Through the Night, But Now You Can't

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