16 Lies All Moms Tell Other Moms

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Admit it: No matter how close you are to your mom friends, you feed them a lot of lies. Some fibs are told in an attempt to keep parents blissfully ignorant of the demon spawn they've created ("your child is a perfect angel") while other fabrications may merely help you avoid these kids yourself ("Dang, I would love to have a play date, but my daughter JUST threw up! Some other time?").

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Whatever the reason they're told, certain lies are so ubiquitous that it can really help to know what they are. So to assist on that front, here are some of the most common lies moms tell each other. That way, if you hear one of these doozies, you'll be able to read between the lines -- or trot out one of these fibs yourself. Trust us when we say that sometimes, honesty is not the best policy!

  1. "If I watched their kid on a play date, I'll always say, 'No, they didn't give me too hard of a time' even if I wanted rip my hair out!"
  2. "If a child is misbehaving, I'll say, 'Oh, he probably just didn't get enough sleep.' What I really mean: Oh, you're finally reaping the result of inconsistent parenting."
  3. "I've said, 'It's just a phase; she'll outgrow all that' while thinking this kid meets all the criteria for an ADHD diagnosis. It wasn't a mom I knew very well, so I wasn't comfortable telling her there's probably something going on with her daughter. A doctor or teacher will tell her eventually."
  4. "I'll say, 'Aww, your baby is so cute!' when I'm really thinking, 'Oh my god, he  looks like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.' Seriously, not all babies are cute."
  5. "I'll say 'Absolutely! I'd love to have a play date! Let's meet at the park!' What I don't say: Your kids are so awful, I don't want them destroying my house again! But I also feel sorry for you since no one else wants your kids over, either. So, at least at the park, they can't do any harm to my home."
  6. "When we include another child with us to the water park ($38/child), movie ($20/child), restaurant ($15/child) and so on and the parents don't offer to pay a dime, I say, 'It's OK, we got it! We don't mind.' But we do. It bothers me that some parents think that because we may have more money, we owe it to them to pay the way for their kids."
  7. "When siblings arrive unannounced to play dates I've said, 'Oh, no problem, what's one more kid?'"
  8. "I'll say 'No really, it's okay you're late' when they show up, like, two hours late after you watched their kids. It's really not okay!"

    More from The Stir: 12 Kids Moms Hate Having Over for Play Dates

  9. "I once managed to say, 'Oh it's fine!' after one mom's 7-year-old threw a tantrum and flung my iPad down and shattered the screen. The mom couldn't afford to buy me a new one, so what's the use of telling the truth? And my warranty just was up."
  10. "I've said, 'Yes, your child really does seem special' to my friend when she told me that her daughter was destined for great things and so mature for her age. Even though I didn't believe it. I was tired, so I just let it go."
  11. "I've told moms 'I can't babysit right now, my daughter is napping.' The reality: She doesn't take a nap for another hour. I just don't want to babysit your kid!"
  12. "I've said, 'Of course, it doesn't bother me that you brought your kids over hours earlier than you said you were going to for your date night and didn't even feed them.'"
  13. "I tell parents 'I don't mind picking up the mess' their kids made even after I told them several times to clean it up and they still didn't."
  14. "My biggest white lie I've ever told another mom was, 'She napped great!' When that child would NOT take a freaking nap for HOURS. The mom was at the end of her rope and just needed a break for the day."
  15. "I say, 'It's okay that your child doesn't want to share' when actually I'm thinking, 'What a brat!'"
  16. "I've said, 'No, of course it doesn't bother me when your spawn has destroyed my child's room, breaking toys and pulling down the curtains. Bring him over anytime!'"

What lies have you told other moms about their kids?

 

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