25 Most Outrageous Bits of Parenting Advice Moms Have Ever Gotten

Caroline Olney | Feb 5, 2015 Being a Mom

What is it about a pregnant belly or a new baby that just screams, "I'M HELPLESS, I NEED ADVICE!" It seems like everyone -- the in-laws, the neighbors, the grocery store clerk -- wants to weigh in on how to raise the perfect child. And while it's well-meant (you hope, anyway), a lot of that advice will be ridiculous, outrageous, or just plain bad.

Ladies: PLEASE consult your doctor before believing anyone who tells you to put pee in your kid's eye (really) or giving them whiskey. And in the meantime, enjoy this list of the worst and most ridiculous advice moms have ever gotten.

What's the worst advice YOU'VE gotten as a mom? Can it top #4?

 

Image via PathDoc/shutterstock

  • To cure colic ...

    1

    Oguz Dikbakan/shutterstock

    blow cigarette smoke over a spoonful of formula and feed to the baby. Or, you know ... don't ...

  • If your baby is spitting up breast milk ...

    2

    FamVeld/shutterstock

    then he doesn't LIKE breast milk, and you should feed him formula instead.

  • To prevent an outtie or umbilical hernia ...

    3

    Jerome Scholler/shutterstock

    tape a coin to your baby's belly button. 

  • To stop your baby from being a devil child ...

    4

    Sedletsky/shutterstock

  • To clear a clogged tear duct ...

    5

    SvetlanaFedoseyeva/shutterstock

    put pee in your child's eye.

  • To avoid stretching your nipples ...

    6

    Image © iStock.com/maybefalse

    don't breastfeed past a year, or you'll need plastic surgery to put them back.

    More from The Stir24 Crazy Bits of Parenting Advice From Grandma

  • You'll give your baby spine damage ...

    7

    Image © iStock.com/KatarzynaBialasiewicz

    by sitting her upright in your lap.

  • If you ever want your baby to learn how to talk ...

    8

    Image © iStock.com/PJPhoto69

    NEVER teach him sign language.

  • If you don't want your breast milk to curdle ...

    9

    Image © iStock.com/STEEX

    never go outside when the weather is hot.

  • To reduce your baby's fever ...

    10

    Pshenina_m/shutterstock

    dress him in blue.

  • If a baby has a toothache ...

    11

    Image © iStock.com/trigga

    soak a cotton ball in whiskey and give it to her to chew on.

  • Don't let your kid look at the sun ...

    12

    Martin Novak/shutterstock

    if you don't want them to be permanently cross-eyed and blind.

  • To stop your baby from teething ...

    13

    sNike/shutterstock

    let him gnaw on a bone. Like a dog.

  • To keep your baby healthy ...

    14

    Image © iStock.com/Westbury

    she must wear hats and/or socks at all times ... regardless of weather.

    More from The Stir10 Snarky Responses to Unwanted Parenting Advice

  • If you don't want your baby to be racist ...

    15

    Image © iStock.com/JBryson

    hire a babysitter of a different race.

  • Give your baby two ounces of water a day or else ...

    16

    Loke Yek Mang/shutterstock

    they'll never drink water when they're older. (This one came from a pediatrician, folks!)

  • You child is guaranteed to become colickly if ...

    17

    Image © iStock.com/Krakozawr

    you let ceiling fans -- or any kind of wind -- blow directly onto them.

  • To avoid pneumonia ...

    18

    Image © iStock.com/hilmi_m

    let your baby cry to clear out their lungs.

  • If you don't want your baby to suffocate ...

    19

    Image © iStock.com/vasare

    then get rid of your cat. Cats smell milk on the baby's breath and can suffocate them while trying to lick/suck it out of the baby's mouth while they're sleeping.

  • To get your baby to sleep through the night ...

    20

    Africa Studio/shutterstock

    give him a spoonful of cough syrup before putting him to sleep.

    More from The StirThe Best Parenting Advice I Ever Got

  • To keep 'evil spirits' away from your baby ...

    21

    JULIE LUCHT/shutterstock

    keep him away from women on their periods.

  • To cure your baby's ear ache ...

    22

    Image © iStock.com/morfius861

    blow cigarette smoke in her ear and then stuff a cotton ball in it.

  • Don't breastfeed past one year ...

    23

    Image © iStock.com/oksix

    if you don't want him to develop a desire for incestuous relations.

  • If you want your baby to sleep through the night ...

    24

    Image © iStock.com/PeopleImages

    keep her up all day.

  • Don't dress your baby in red ...

    25

    Image © iStock.com/_chupacabra_

    or it'll attract 'the evil eye'.

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