An Open Letter to My Pregnant Friends I Refused to Be Happy For

pregnant bellyDear formerly pregnant friends,

I know this is way, way overdue on my part -- but I really owe you an apology for how I reacted when you excitedly told me you were going to be a mom. The minute "I'm pregnant!" came out of your mouth, I saw the look of pure joy and elation on your face. But what did I do instead of sharing in that happiness with you? I immediately started ranting and raving about how much your life was going to change -- and not necessarily for the better.

And I wasn't trying to rain on your parade ... I swear. I simply thought giving you the brutally honest version of what to expect with a baby's arrival would spare you hours and hours of sitting on the couch crying and wondering why you weren't adjusting naturally to motherhood ... because that's what happened to me after I had my kid.


But while my "advice" was delivered with good intentions, I now realize it was not only unwanted ... it was uncalled for and inappropriate. And in your eyes, it probably sounded downright mean. I guess it sort of was.

You know the old saying, "karma's a bitch"? Yeah, well it must be true. Because now I know EXACTLY how awful I made you feel at one of the most exciting times of your life.

And tomorrow will be one of the most exciting times in mine. You see ... we're picking up our new rescue puppy, who is arriving via transport from Arkansas late morning. And while I have received loads of well wishes and support from friends and family -- I've also gotten quite a few comments about how much my life is going to absolutely suck to high hell after getting a dog. Yes, I know starting this new chapter will have its challenges and my lifestyle will change ... but I'm ready for this step.

More from The Stir15 Lies Every Pregnant Woman Tells Herself

And while I welcome helpful tips and advice, I really don't appreciate the passive aggressive comments I've received about this pup -- especially when it's something I'm so clearly thrilled about.

When I tell people we're getting a dog, all I really want to hear is, "That's wonderful, Mary! I am so happy for you and your family."

And now I fully realize those words were all my pregnant friends ever wanted to hear from me.

On that note, I take back every remotely negative sounding thing I ever said to you about how hard having a baby is. Yes ... it's hard. But anything in life that's worth anything at all is HARD. (That's just the way it works.)

Please forget whatever I said and replace it with this simple statement:

"What wonderful news! I'm SO happy for you. And I can't wait to meet your beautiful baby."

With my heartfelt apologies,



Image via jonny.hunter/Flickr

Read More >