8 Reasons Gisele Bundchen Is a Better Mom Than You'll EVER Be

Gisele Bundchen

Well, she's done it again folks. With this new photo of Gisele Bundchen breastfeeding baby Vivian all while being pampered like the model she is -- she's once again proven that, quite simply, she's the best damn mom on the face of this planet.

I mean -- she's just amazing ... right? Not only is she going above and beyond by sticking to the whole "breast is best" philosophy even though her child is over a year old -- she's also doing the rest of the world a favor by making sure she looks nothing short of her very best.

Shame on moms who neglect their hair, skin, and nails because they're too busy doing things like working, shuttling their kids from place to place, and trying to keep the house clean and get a decent meal on the table. There's no reason you shouldn't be able to get everything in.


I guess the majority of us just aren't as good at multitasking as Gisele. She's quick to point that out, considering she made it a point to note that the now infamous breastfeeding photo was taken after she only had three hours of sleep.

And if this self-indulgent pic doesn't remind you what a shitty, shitty mom you are -- here are eight other obvious reasons that Gisele Bundchen is a better parent than you could ever possibly hope to be.

  1. She had a pain-free labor and delivery -- What ... you thought childbirth was tough? You're such a wuss. Grow a pair, already. Oh, and did I mention she was up walking around and making pancakes afterward? What was your lazy ass doing?
  2. She didn't wear maternity clothes -- You fat ass! Gisele's willpower is so amazing, she managed to sneak through her entire nine months of pregnancy without going near an elastic waistband. She's a rock star, I tell you.
  3. She got pregnant the right way -- Duh. What kind of person in her right mind has a kid without making sure Prince Charming is by her side? Being a single mom or getting knocked up by anyone less than your dream dude is just plain irresponsible. 
  4. She didn't torture her babies by giving birth in a hospital -- OMG. Don't you know that hospitals are basically nothing more than a platform for violent births? Gah.
  5. She moonlights as a lawyer -- Ahh ... yes. Gisele is so passionate about nursing, she thinks breastfeeding should be a law. Formula-feeding moms should totally be arrested.
  6. She's no garbage disposal -- Ugh. But so many pregnant women are. You think being pregnant means you can indulge in a few decent meals without judgment? Yeah ... Gisele knows that's a bunch of bull. She was "mindful" of what she ate during pregnancy ... because of course she was.
  7. She's a kick ass stepmom -- You can't even handle your own kids; meanwhile, Gisele thinks Bridget Moynahan's kid is hers. All hers.
  8. She's an attachment parenting guru -- If you can't carry one kid on your back and another on your front like Gisele, you might as well just go ahead and admit how bad you suck at life. You're a complete failure.

What else does Gisele do that reminds you how inferior you are?


Image via Instagram

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