Why Moms Should Drink More Wine

wineOnce upon a time I was (and still am!) a mother, but I had a very good girl friend that wasn’t. Years passed, and she became a mom (to four!!), and she confessed something to me. She said, “Before I was a mom, I silently judged you for your nightly glass of wine. Now I get it. Pass the pinot, please.” 

Can I get a “Wazzz up”? (Except for the Mormons and Nazarenes, bless their hearts.)

Now in news that will vindicate moms on otherwise boring play dates everywhere, it turns out that a little bit of liquor actually makes you smarter! Or makes discussions about minivans and/or jogging strollers less boring. Break out the sangria at your next mommy-meet up, because scientists at the University of Illinois at Chicago have discovered that “creativity increases 50 percent after a few drinks — and speeds up response times.”


For the study, subjects were given a few vodka-cranberries to raise their blood alcohol content to .08, the legal limit for driving. They were then given a series of word game questions to solve, such as “What word can be used in combination with peach, arm, and tar?” The answer is pit, by the way.

Imbibers got more answers right, and faster, than the (less fun) sober control group. Team Lush answered an average of nine questions in 11.5 seconds each, compared to the six in 15.2 seconds each for the nondrinkers.

More from The Stir: A Drink a Day Keeps the Bed Bugs Away

So what’s up with all the puritanical judgment on three-martini lunches play dates? You know the type ... she’s the one always saying, “Well in my house, we never eat cookies for snack.” She also claims that she never feeds her kids fast food, while completely ignoring the pile of Happy Meal toys her kids are playing with. Sure lady, you went to McDonald’s for the toys. Does it fly when your husband says he reads Playboy for the articles? Ironically, this is probably the lady that needs that drink the most -- it might help dislodge that stick up her you-know-what.

The science is settled, people, and chardonnay is here to stay. Alcohol doesn’t just make us think we’re smarter and prettier; it actually does make us smarter and prettier! Okay, maybe the science is still out on that whole pretty thing, but I know I feel prettier after a glass or two. I’m also pretty sure I’m better, calmer mother, much more able to roll with the punches than my sober self. What’s that, baby? You gave the dog a haircut, colored on the wall, and made a potion out of shampoo in the sink? How creative! Now clean it all up while Mommy refills her glass.

Now if you’ll excuse me, there’s a box of wine in the fridge with my name on it.


Image via kyknoord/Flickr

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