New Mom Secret: I Sometimes Hate My Baby

It's hard being a new mom (or even an experienced mom to a new baby) and sometimes we do things we know we shouldn't, despite what all the experts say. But this is a safe place to share your secrets (PM me)—we'll never tell.

This Week's Secret:



My son is 3-months-old and I am shocked by motherhood and all it entails. At first I thought I would get used to it, but now I am just spending more and more time crying and depressed and feeling like I want my old life back. Maybe it is because I had not really "settled down" when I got pregnant. I went right from partying every night and hanging out with friends to being totally grounded with my baby. My boyfriend has been helpful, but he and I are not together anymore, so it is really up to me alone and I really hate it most of the time. Does this ever get better? — Anonymous

There are a couple answers to your question. Yes, it gets better, much better, in fact. And also: You should get help. Raising a baby alone or with just a boyfriend with whom you do not live is not easy. The first three months are hard for all new moms and all new moms feel that way, too, but you do have special circumstances.

My advice would be to ask your friends, parents, siblings and anyone else for help. Be honest with them about how you are feeling and make sure you are talking openly. If you can cultivate this now, you will have a great support system as your baby grows.

You will undoubtedly be less "green" in a few months and will be much happier and more comfortable with motherhood, but it still does take a village. It is impossible to do it completely alone. If it feels more serious, seek professional help. There is no shame in that.

Do you have any advice for this mom?

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