Maybe I'll Be a Better Parent When My Kids Are Older

I don't really get toddlers and pre-schoolers, but then, who does? OK, maybe the experts do and people trained in child development and education, but for the rest of us hack parents? These demanding little screamers who want one thing one minute and the opposite the next are hella confusing. Which is why I'm looking forward to having big kids.

I have sort of resigned myself to the sad reality of chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, and Pirate's Booty for the foreseeable future, but photos of Cindy Crawford taking her 10- and 12-year-old to Nobu in Malibu made me so excited for the day that my children also like expensive sushi. Because I think I will be a better mom then.

The things that toddlers thrive on -- predictability, structure, even voices, discipline -- are my worst qualities. I am impulsive and fun, apt to pick a day and go to the beach with no proper planning (or sunscreen). I like to live this way but toddlers don't.


Therefore, I have decided I will be a better mom to my children once they're past 8. Then my penchant for horror movies, late night candy binges, impulse purchases, and over the top obsession with clothing will be the stuff of mommy dreams. I will totally be the awesome mom whose kids want to have their friends over. Just like my mom was. At some point my children might like these things about me. But now? Not so much.

This isn't to say I'm a totally irresponsible parent who will let my kids stay up all night and rot their teeth. I'm not that at all. But I do look forward to the time when I can see my kids more as pals than strange little people who demand all my time, need things constantly, and throw themselves on the floor and scream no matter how fun our day was.

Yeah. I long for the days of Nobu and intelligent conversations, for the days when the mere suggestion of a vegetable doesn't send them to the floor screaming while I dig my nails into my palms trying to remain calm because I know it's best for them.

I long for the days when their little monkey brains are just a little more stable. I think we will both like each other a lot better then. Of course, by then I will be writing posts about how I miss their sweet soft cheeks and baby faces, how I wish they were still little enough to cuddle and crawl in my lap.

We can't win, can we?

Do you ever wish your kids were older?


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