I have done a vast assortment of idiotic things in the name of achieving a flawless complexion. Just ask me how many virgins were slaughtered so that I might bathe in their blood. No. Wait. Don't, actually. Love, Elizabeth of Bathory.
Jokes about virgin-murder aside, there isn't much I haven't tried. When pigeon-poop facials were de rigueur, it was only my poverty that saved me from having my face professional coated with the feces of everyone's favorite rats with wings. Guess who's got two thumbs, not a lot of money, and no desire to catch a latter-day strain of the bubonic plague? This girl!
More from The Stir: Here's What Kyle Richards & Hannibal Lecter Have in Common
I've been extracted, steamed, peeled, and prodded. Not every treatment has exactly, uh, worked (I'm looking at you, olive oil with which I foolishly coated my entire face, you sassy beast). But if I found one that kept my ish as fresh as The Face of Boe, I'd keep doing it no matter how strange it might seem to assorted haters.
This is all by way of saying that I don't find any one of Kyle Richards' facialist's tricks that horrifying, really. Her esthetician at Carina Skin Care has a terrific sense of humor about the paces she puts Kyle through. Exhibit her referring to one mask (pictured below) as Kyle's "Hannibal Lecter" treatment.
No, Kyle is not being quietly probed by deviant aliens for earth's greatest secrets, she's just getting an electrical face treatment. In this procedure, a water-soluble cream is absorbed by the skin with the help of nature's Red Bull, electricity. Ben Franklin, behold what wonders you have wrought.
What's the weirdest thing you've ever done to your face in the name of beauty?
Image via Bravo