Hey Hey! Ho Ho! Your Floral Pants Have Got to Go!

Rant 14

ASOSI know that hideous floral pants are a "thing" this summer, but I didn't realize how bad it had gotten until I opened up the Sunday New York Times and saw literally dozens of women pictured in them last weekend out on the sidewalks of Park Avenue.


According to the NYT, the "most interesting" styles of floral pants were the "pajama-like styles," like these Somedays Lovin Muchacho Floral Pants (Urban Outfitters, $89).

Let's recap. Park Avenue. Cutting-edge fashionistas. Wearing FLORAL PAJAMA PANTS.

Women of New York, I ask you:


But wait! It gets worse!

ASOSThe TRULY fashion-forward out there have been committing DOUBLE FLORAL this summer -- wearing a matching floral top and bottoms. I even saw a photo of Rihanna earlier this summer in an outfit much like this one.

I just. I can't. I CAN'T.


ASOSAnd then there's the floral jumpsuit. Here's the brutal truth, ladies. A floral jumpsuit is not flattering on ANYONE'S figure, let alone a curvy girl. I know because I know.


The Corner

And I have to say it is a dark day indeed coming to the realization that someone, somewhere paid $1,535 for these pants. I AM NOT EVEN KIDDING.

My 6-year-old just looked over my shoulder as I was writing these words. "Those pants costed one thousand, five hundred thirty-five DOLLARS?" he asked.

"Yep," I sighed.

"Those look like pajamas, right?" he said.


"People BUYED them?!"


I think it's appropriate for a 6-year-old to have the final word on this post. But before I go, I want to know this ...

Would YOU wear floral pajama-like pants in the name of Fashion? Are you wearing them now? Because if you are, uh ... I'm sure you look fabulous!


Images (top to bottom): Urban Outfitters, ASOS, ASOS, The Corner

clothes, trends, summer 2013


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Valerie Metzger

Oh, truth. I'm pretty sure some fashion trends are started just to see if people really will buy anything in the name of staying current.

Rhond... RhondaVeggie

I totally rocked floral jeans I'll have you know.

Back in 1988...

nonmember avatar sparklemama

Stop! Hammertime!

nonmember avatar Dianne

I've seen a handful of floral patterns I considered pretty enough to wear...a handful amongst hundreds of others...but at the end of the day I could not risk matching a grandmothers sofa set. And every straight man, including my partner, considers florals hideous.

wamom223 wamom223

Its totally hammertime!!!!  This is two styles coming back from the past.  I remember the floral jeans of the late 80's and I'll never forget my step-brother yelling out, "those pants look like sheets" when my sister got a pair for her birthday.  Some things are better left in the past.  But I can't wait until these end up at a second hand shop because they have 80's costume written all over them.

kisse... kisses5050

laura ashley sheets

Julie Winkler

hell no! this a part of the 80's that needs to remain history. I'm glad there are other sensable women out there that realize floral pants are hideous! 

Nancy... NancyJ422

All of those clothing choices look straight out of the 80s!  Even that 2 piece floral thing.  Didn't wear it then, won't wear it now.  But I did have some really cool summer flowered pants that I really really liked!

Evaly... EvalynCarnate

Holy hell...I'm having horrible grade school flashbacks of the time my mom sent me to school is paisley jeans.... Oh the horror....THE HORROR!!

nonmember avatar Gbea

I have some great floral pants I bought at Target a few months ago. So, at least they weren't $1,535?

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