Thongs Are Really Just Torture Devices No Woman Should Wear

LOL 33

thongRemember the corset? The ones from way back when women essentially gave themselves 24-hour agita? We were really repressed (and pressed in) back then. Not cool. You know what else isn't cool? Thongs. Why anyone would want to wear something all up in your butt cheeks is beyond me. One wrong wiggle, and that string can get all up in your lady parts.

I could see if you want to be all sexy pants and wear them for the five seconds before your lover rips them off, but an all-day affair with your butt munching a piece of fabric? No thanks. Still, I know some women who prefer the thong and it's baffling why.

The number one reason, though, seems to be panty lines. PANTY LINES? Why care about panty lines? You can't see them unless you have a mirror, so just pretend anything back there isn't an issue. Besides, I heard from one guy one time that panty lines are sexy because he feels he can envision the shape of the woman's ass better that way. Hmm ... okay that might be a reason to wear a thong instead. As for me, I'd rather nix anything that you can see panty lines in than wear some butt floss. No thank you! My butt prefers to expel things rather than take them in. I guess you all now know where I stand on anal sex.

By the way, one of my friends, who used to be a thong-only kind of gal, stopped when she got vaginal e. coli. True story. Some boy shorts (and medicine) quickly remedied her ailing vagina.

It's why we wipe front to back, ladies. It's why we shouldn't have pieces of fabric all intimate in the rear. And oh my gosh, could you imagine wearing a thong with a hemorrhoid?!

Thongs. They don't cover your butt cheeks, which essentially makes them colder. They are like a wedgie that just will not quit. It's a terrible torture invention that no woman should wear. Supposedly invented by a man, thongs should never be worn by a woman.

Do you wear thongs? If so, why?


Image via movethelife/Flickr



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smtxc... smtxcowgirl

Yes, because I don't want panty lines.  They're unsightly and not classy.  You can find thongs that aren't up in your business, they don't have to be all string.  

nonmember avatar gigimama

A doctor once told me thongs are racetracks for bacteria. So, when I see thongs, I think yuck yuck yuck. I'd rather see panty lines!

nikki... nikkivolkov

I disagree. I'm a girl who has what my mom refered to as a "bubble butt". All types of panties seem to ride up and give me wedgies or in the case of boy shorts they roll on my thighs. Weird body type I guess. I didn't discover thongs till highscool (yes the thong song was my awakening) and I've worn them ever since. BTW I've never even had had a yeast infection much less whatever your friend got. I think if you wash yourself and your underthings regularly this should never be an issue. I'd much rather have a little string where its supposed to be than a whole wad of fabric from supposedly comfortable panties up my netherregions. Plus I never have lines.

nonmember avatar guest

I have yet to find a thong that doesn't get all up in my maybe the first commentor or someone else could elaborate on a brand that is comfortable?? And no panty line?? How many times have I seen a woman who is obviously wearing a thong...cuz u can see it!!!!! What's the difference??

dirti... dirtiekittie

i wear them, and it's a personal comfort thing. i buy cotton thongs, not g-strings (if you're talking about a "string up your butt" then it's not a thong) and look for cotton crotches just like any other panty. as @nikkivolkov said, it's also about cleanliness. there are plenty of women who only wear regular cotton underwear and they still get yeast infections too. (fwiw, i've been wearing thongs for over 12 years and the only yeast infection i got was a side effect from pregnancy hormones, and i wasn't wearing a thong then :/ lol)

wyote... wyotechangel

because i dont want to look like a fat sack of trash. panty lines trashy and they look good. btw been wearing one since i was 15 and i have never had a yeast infection or anything you nastys got. do you not whipe of shower? why would you want a huge piece of cotton riding up over your pants eww.

CPN322 CPN322

I think your friends vagina trouble could have been caused by the material of the underwear and not the thong itself, but I'm not a doctor. I just remember my gyno telling me certain materials are not good for underwear because, I believe he basically said they don't let your vagina breath. I do wear thongs because I don't like panty lines. They just don't look good and make me self conscious. I also go for the ones with more material and not the g strings. Those I hate!!

Guest - was the woman whose thong you could see wearing light colored pants? I've never been able to tell a woman was wearing a thong so I'm just curious.

fleur... fleurdelys3110

I've been wearing thongs for years and I've never had a problem with them. However, I only wear them during the day when I'm wearing leggings or other tight pants, never with jeans or to sleep. I agree with some of the other posters that the reason your friend probably had an issue was because of the material of her thongs. I only wear hanky panky and commando thongs. Yes, they're rather expensive, but they're the best and most comfortable thongs money can buy. SO worth it. Panty lines are trashy. A good wardrobe starts with good foundations -- a good fitting bra and a comfortable thong.

nonmember avatar Guest

I agree with the other posters I've been wearing thongs for almost 10 years & I've never had any issues, I have a larger but & wearing any other type of underwear just causes a wedgie with four times the amount of fabric I'd rather have a thinner piece of fabric testing comfortably than constantly be pulling a wad of fabric out of my but cheeks & trying to smooth out panty lines (see tacky) all day

Doomy234 Doomy234

I used to only wear thongs, but once I went back to regular panties, I havent worn thongs since. (Except when its laundry day and I am out of regular panties) I dont think thongs are uncomfortable, besides maybe g-strings. And I have never gotten any nasty infections from wearing thongs. I am not concerned about panty lines because, well, I dont give a damn what other people think about how I look. The only one whose opinion of my ass matters is my husband, and he loves it no matter what I am wearing. ;)

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