A new HBO documentary called About Face: The Supermodels, Then and Now explores the world of supermodels and what happens when women who made a living being young and gorgeous stop being young. Answer: it's not as easy as it should be.
No matter how much we claim older women are attractive or sexy, it always has a qualifier. Salma Hayek is sexy at 40. Helen Mirren is hot for an older woman. There is the sense that older women are put out to pasture to make way for the new lovelies who will soon be old themselves.
It can make aging a terrifying and frustrating prospect, especially for those whose stock and trade is their looks. Isabella Rossellini, once the darling of society, says in the film:
My social status has diminished because I know I’m not invited to the A parties anymore. My daughter is. As you grow older, you don’t count anymore.
Scathing words, to be sure. But they are also true. Even for those women who aren't famous and are just normal, aging is a hard process. One friend who is in her mid-40s says around the age of 37, men just stopped noticing her.
I haven't experienced that yet, but I have definitely felt diminished in stature and attention by being slightly older. There is an unspoken beauty in youth itself. Women in their 20s take it for granted and have no idea that it doesn't last forever. Youth is wasted on the young and all that.
There is more to life, though, than beauty. At least I think there is. Right? Right? I, for one, will be looking forward to seeing this documentary for many reasons.
I love the idea that at some point (please Lord), we will reach a point where we do value wisdom and age over youth and beauty. As our skin wrinkles and crinkles around the eyes, our hair grays, and our perky boobs droop, wouldn't it be nice to imagine we are entering a new kind of beauty? It would be just as valued and revered and we might be excited to enter it rather than dragged kicking and screaming. Is it possible?
Do you hate aging?
Image via HBO
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Comments 8
No and yes. :). At 44 I am adjusting to what aging means. I was not excited to see myself changing a few years ago, at about the time I was 40. Looking back I realize my mid to late 30's were a time I felt very happy about my appearance. It was my peak so to speak. I had my mid life crisis in the backyard and put up my tent and camped for 3 months. Of course the kids joined me and constantly reminded me about what really matters in life. I emerged in the fall when school was to start a different person. I was now 40 and ready for what that would mean. Over the past 4 years I have traveled with my mind in a transcending way so that I am understanding what aging means for me. I am no different even when my hairs turn grey but my perceived sexuality in society is really what is at stake and it is mostly an unconscious struggle all of us women struggle with as we age. Being who I am and understanding the satisfaction and happiness in my life and always appreciating my deep fortunes as a mother and wife is what I set out for when I was young, 20 and getting married. So that does not change. I have put it into perspective for myself because honestly my sexuality...my youthful sexiness is independent of my happiness so I let it go.
These days I look in the mirror and like what I see. I love my greys and my maturing look. I have come to accept that aging is a chapter in my book of life. I love my life as it is and so I am loving changing now just as much as at any other time in my life. The changes itself can be hard but getting there I am finding a peaceful sense of being whole and happy with myself. I look at happy old people and they do not act as if they are miserable. I want to be one of them...
I'm 23 and yes I hate aging.
I just turned 24. I fucking hate aging. I'm already seeing signs of it. Ugh.