How a Mom Gets Ready for the Oscars (PHOTOS)

mom gets ready for oscarsGod help me I'm trying to fix myself up for The 84th Annual Academy Awards with jcp, and all the other fans in the bleachers on the red carpet. Even before I had kids, I wasn't the most make-up and hair savvy. Needless to say, since working from home for far too long, and chasing after children, I'm even less so.

Unfortunately I don't have a stylist, trainer, chauffeur or any of those things. I do, however, have Katy Perry's new false eyelashes. Of course, I've never, ever, ever, tried to glue eyelashes to my face before, so let's see how this goes.


All right, I'm not doing this. Too risky.

Instead, I'm going to go back to what I learned from Blushington and go big on my lip color and dramatic eye makeup and leave the rest of it alone. Katy Perry's lashes will have to wait until my daughter becomes a mall-walking tween.

Now onto the hair! I always wear a ponytail, and in fact feel weird when I'm sporting long hair, but I decided to get a blow-out after a hair trim in preparation for wanting my hair to look better than I am capable of doing. And I brought these to my hair appointment -

mom gets ready for oscars

Because I have no idea what to do with them, or if any of this is appropriate. And in the case of that big black band in the back, what it even is. And my amazing stylist gave me a, "No, no, yes, definitely -- this is how you do it," and then proceeded to teach me how to get the poof -

mom gets ready for oscars

Basically it's about back-combing, but with small brush that gives you more volume. Dessarae is a wonderful hair gal, and is opening her own salon, so go there to learn about the mysteries of hair. Once you've got the volume, you can lightly brush it, wear it like Snooki (although I don't advise it), wear it to the side, or even wear it up. Like this demo -

mom gets ready for oscars

Then you hair spray the crap out of it and go to the show! 

And now I've put it all together, like so -

mom gets ready for oscars

Let's see how long it lasts as I'm guzzling champagne at the Oscars!



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