Recently I've been thinking that my shoes are kind of boring -- always with the soles and the laces -- so unoriginal. If only there were some footwear out there that made me stand tall in a crowd and stand out among the masses. If only there were a shoe that could aerate the lawn just as effectively as it could kill a hateful passerby or get me backstage at an Iron Maiden concert. If only ... until now.
Haute couture designer Iris van Herpen, who's been called the Alexander McQueen of tech geeks, has teamed up with shoemakers United Nude to fulfill our unrequited fantasy. Introducing ... the fang shoe.
They're part of van Herpen's Spring/Summer 2012 collection. Made of fiberglass and carbon fiber shaped like fangs, these shoes are what we in the industry like to call "famaze," short for "f***ing amazing." No info yet on how much these puppies will go for, or if they'll even be available for purchase, but I'll dream about them nonetheless. Me want fang shoes.
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If we mere fashion peons can't get our hands, or our feet, on these, I'm sure we'll see them on the likes of Lady Gaga, Bjork, or I don't know, Ke$ha. Who knows, maybe Phil Mickelson or Tiger Woods will want a pair -- extra grip on the golf course never hurt anyone.
The only concern I have with these fang shoes is the sound they'll make on hard surfaces. I sort of imagine them sounding like raptor claws clicking on marble -- like in Jurassic Park when the raptors invade the welcome center. Click, click, click. It would be kind of creepy to sound like one of nature's most vicious carnivores, but kind of awesome, as well.
Fang shoes might not be for the girl next door (ghoul next door?) but they are bloody fabulous.
Don't you agree?
Photos via unitednude.com
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Comments 34
Yuck!!
yikes!
I love me some heels.... but i will pass on these ugly things. WOW!
They look really cool, but I would not wear them...lol
They are insane. I mean, yeah, I get it if you are very Goth, or need them for a costume...otherwise you just look nuts.
theyre fugly !
I think i would wear these maybe twice in a lifetime to the new Twilight movie, then on halloween lol
Tacky and classless.
WTF are you smoking?
They look kinda cool but I prefer more practical footwear. I don't even wear heels because they make no sense to me. I'm already tall, they hurt my feet, and I can't run very well in them. Totally pointless. I could see a point to heels if I were short and wanting to wear a long formal dress to a dance or a party or something but as it stands they really offer me no benefit.