5 Things Never to Say to Women With Short Hair


short hairWhen the "sh*t people say" video meme veered from trying to make people laugh to trying to make boneheads with no tact shut up, I had to jump on board. My 6-foot-tall friend found one dedicated to the ridiculous things she's heard countless times from people who can't get over her height, and I've seen more than a few about race and ethnicity that make me shake with rage.

But all you video makers out there missed a group that hears plenty of comments from the peanut gallery -- and none of them good! We are the ladies who rock a short haircut. And if you think you've got something funny to say to us, do yourself a favor. Don't. Because you'll probably find it lands right there on the list of things we've heard before -- and never want to hear again:

1. Whoa, so what does your husband think? He actually let you do that? -- What is this "let" you speak of?

2. You must have a lot of hats! -- Why? Do I have hat hair? Quick, get me a mirror!

3. You wouldn't be so cold if you grew your hair. You lose most of your heat through your head. -- Actually, scientists debunked that one years ago. I'm cold because it's 12 degrees outside, and you won't shut your trap so I can just walk into the post office and get my mail!

4. I'd love to do that with my hair, but guys don't really like chicks with short hair. -- Wait, back up. Did you just say what you think you said?

5. Are you a lesbian? -- Yes! Didn't you know that the minute a set of clippers touches your scalp, you instantly develop a preference for girls? Your hairdresser may say she is just trying to trim the stray stuff around your ears ... but she's really a secret operative from the lesbianese army!

And now for one I don't mind at all:

Did you have cancer? -- Technically this one is still rude to most ladies with little in the locks department, but I shave my head every year for the St. Baldrick's Foundation, raising money to fight childhood cancer. You just gave me an opening to talk about my favorite charity, so thanks!

Is there a "sh*t people say" video on behalf of you yet? What would it say?


Image by Kentrina Kimball

hair, hats, general hilarity


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Melis... Melissa042807

Those are all absolutely true! I know a lady who has a short, cropped hairstyle and she totally rocks it. Somehow one day a conversation turned in the direction of her hair and I asked what led her to decide to cut it that short, because it really is so cute on her. She said it started as a social experiement for a college class - she had to "walk in someone else's shoes", and long story short, she ended up shaving her then shoulder-length hair off. Her husband was in the bathroom helping her and her daughter - who had jokingly suggested it - was standing in the doorway shrieking "Mom! I was just kidding!" LOL As her hair grew back, she found she liked the way it looked really cropped and has kept it that way. And as I said, it's adorable on her. 

NotLi... NotLikeaCat

Great piece. I keep meaning to write an essay about how cutting my hair was good for me.

My hair is really short. My husband was kind of shocked after my most recent cut. "I thought you were growing it out!" Sorry, honey! He teases me about it, like when I made a joke about how living with me is like living with a frat boy, he said, "No, most frat boys have longer hair than you do." But he still thinks I'm sexy. And I FEEL a lot sexier and happier with short hair instead of long, so that goes a LONG way toward overall sexiness, in my opinion. I know he thinks my hair is too butch, but whatever. _I_ like it. And yes, I also like hats b/c I DO get cold. (And I like girls, because I'm bi. So I guess a lot of your commenters are kind of spot-on if they were talking to me!)

bills... billsfan1104

When I went through Chemo I lost my hair. But i loved it, when it grew back in. It was so nice and short. I miss it. I am really thinking of shaving it off again.

nonmember avatar Tonya

I've always had very nice nails. And I can't count the times people have reached out and felt them in disbelief when I say they're natural. Like I'd lie about having acrylic nails. That's never really bothered me, but I've always felt for my very shy six foot four female cousin. She's beautiful, and people are understandably amazed by her height and beauty, but nonetheless, she hates the attention. I told her I was going to get her a t-shirt that reads, "I'm 6'4". And YES, I played basketball." Because, invariably, those are the two questions she gets asked every time she goes in public.

nonmember avatar blh

The vast majorty of women do not look good with short hair and most guys don't like it. It doesn't matter to me if you and anyone wants short hair but that's the truth. Id never randomly comment on someones hair but since you mentioned it

Mooki... MookiesMom739

I like my short hair because it is low maintenance.. I have the face and head for it- most people think it's cute.  Except one lil boy at my daughter's daycare- asked why I have hair like a boys?-  I asked him did he think I was Mahari's father?  He said no- then I don't have hair like a boys or you would have thought I was one... He was so cute.

Jenny... JennyG0929

I loved my hair when it was short, but I knew my husband hated it so I grew it back out for him.

I used to hear from people "It looks cute on you, but I could never pull that off, you're brave" LOL

nonmember avatar Boysmom

My husband keeps bugging me to get my hair cut really short so some men like it on women. I'm just stalling coz in a household full of boys, I'll end up with the shortest hair of all!

Kritika Kritika

Slobby American women are the only (straight) ones I've ever seen get haircuts like the one featured above. There is a difference between a feminine, short pixie and totally giving up on yourself because "you don't have time." I don't know how on earth any woman thinks a grey crew cut is remotely attractive or fair to do to your husband - that said I doubt any woman with that hair cut is even sleeping with her husband.

And before you jump down my throat, cancer patients obviously have nothing to do with my opinion.

nonmember avatar Melissa

@Kritika-Who gives a s*#t what you think about people's hair? Freedom of choice. If they want to rock a shaved head who are you to decide whether it looks good or not?

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