Good riddance!Hey! How's your ass crack feeling these days? Mine's great, thanks for asking. Why? Because I gave up on thongs about eight years ago. I had spent four long, painful years enduring the trendy thong movement in high school, and by my freshman year of college, I'd had enough -- I got rid of every last one, and my crack's been thanking me every day, ever since. And a new study I found leads me to believe that your ass is on the mend, too. Thong sales are down 17 percent from their peak in 2003. Ass-toundingly good news!
I don't care two snaps of a g-string what Sisqo thinks about our dumps like a truck, or our thighs like what, from here on out I think we can all agree to never show our thong tha thong thong thongs again.
I am so over them, the stupidest most ridiculous piece of non-clothing there ever was, that it's not even funny. I don't find this to be a laughing matter. Thongs are pure evil. Ever taken a road trip in one? Ever tried working out in one? They're the worst.
I won't even acknowledge that they're good when you want to hide pantylines, because there are full pieces of underwear that are line-less that don't feel like you've got a piece of a wire hanger jammed between your butt cheeks. Thongs serve no purpose. The perm-wedgie experience is not necessary.
I really don't see what's sexy about them either. I find leaving something, anything, to the imagination is sexier than your pale arse flapping in the wind. Unless you've got a butt like Pippa's, I think we can all agree that the thong is maybe the last thing we'd wear to excite anyone.
But you know what? We don't have to worry about them anymore. The bottom has fallen out of this cheeky trend, and I think we're all safe. My boyshorts and I couldn't be happier.
What do you think about thongs?
Oh, and did you really think I wasn't going to include this gem?
Photo via Jennzebel/Flickr


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Comments 17
i truly do find thongs more comfy....even if that's weird. kept 'em even during a VERY single period and feel so ODD the few times i do bikiins
They're actually linked to more vaginal infections than you'd believe, including even cases of otherwise unnoticeable e. coli spreading to the vagina. E. coli in your vagina? Eek.
I don't like to see people wear them and you can see them above their jeans.
Plus, Cosmo said thongs were officially "out of style" years ago. I've had a few but threw them away after a few hours. I'd rather go commando than wear a thong.
I'm into the panties that have a smaller butt piece that let's your cheeks hang out the bottom of the panties. From the front they look like regular panties, but the back shows a little cheek. That's all I wear. They look hot if you have a nice ass, and keep it classy, not trashy. :)
I didn't mind them when I was in high school and skinny. But now they are just not comfy. And I really don't see much of a point. My husband is the only one who cares about my underwear, and he would just prefer that I not wear any. I do well avoiding panty lines by wearing good underwear that doesn't show them.
I was in high school in 2003, and so many girls would lean over in their desks, and look exactly like the picture above. And for some reason, I always ended up sitting behind these hookers with alphabetical seating. Gross.
I hate thongs. I have always hated thongs. My friends used to make fun of me for my "granny panties" and try to extol the benefits of the thong, but to no avail. I feel like I have a constant wedgie in thongs. Some women find them comfortable. Fine. Your butt, your business. My butt, my business.
Luckily I am married to a man who finds boyshorts MUCH sexier than thongs. I have no idea why. But I love it because I can wear comfy lingerie.