Kate Middleton Shows What NOT to Do With Your Wedding Dress

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kate middletonIf you're an avid reader of The Stir, you know we're all a little Kate Middleton-obsessed 'round here. Me included (big time). But I'm actually going to have to side with my girl Queen Elizabeth when she called the displaying of Duchess Catherine's wedding dress at Buckingham Palace "horrid" and "dreadful."

I mean, the Alexander McQueen dress was/is stunning, and I totally don't think it's horrid or dreadful, but have you seen the display? It's on a headless mannequin in a dark room with a single light shining over it while the veil hovers atop it. Creepy! I wouldn't want to be left alone in that room with that dress. It looks like a floating spirit. And aside from little kid ghosts, really, what's spookier than ghosts in wedding dresses? Shudder.

So, in an effort to ward off the inevitable nightmares that are going to set up shop in my brain tonight, I started thinking about my wedding dress and its whereabouts (my childhood home's closet) and what the crap we ladies are supposed to do with that big, poofy white thing once the big day is over. Here's what I came up with:

Keep it. Close by. For your next wedding. Don't act like there's not going to be one. It's all fun and games 'til you discover the man you married farts in his sleep.

Sell it. If you're woman enough to tolerate your husband's little "habit," put it up on eBay. You're never going to wear it again, the money would be good, and why not help someone out by letting them save on their wedding dress? (Or better yet, donate it!)

Trash it. If you're such a high-falutin' aristocrat who doesn't need the extra money, trash the bitch. Actually, wedding dress trashing has become a thing. Brides, excuse me wives, put their dress on one last go round and have "artsy" photos of themselves taken doing things like swimming in the ocean or rolling around in the mud. I, personally, am against this method.

Turn it into something else. How cute would it be if you, like, had a cat wedding and the bride wore a miniature version of your dress? So cute! Or you can use it as a tablecloth, and tell your guests that they're literally eating off of love. Ooh, or what about a shower curtain. Surely, there's some way to rig it so it protects water from spraying all over your bathroom floor every three days, or however often you shower. You can look at it every day and think, "I dooo ... not want to shower!"

Display it. Like Kate did. No head, floating veil, dim light. Just do it on Halloween and be sure to add plenty of fake blood and guts. Maybe a cobweb or two and one of those spider rings.

What did you do with your wedding dress after you got married?


Image via americanistadechiapas/Flickr

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sweet... sweetcherry_59

I trashed my dress and I would do it a million times over. The pictures are stunning and I have them displayed with out wedding pictures. I have those pictures forever instead of a dress I will never wear again!

kisse... kisses5050

 I donated it to a church that remake them into quinceanera gowns for girls who cant afford new gowns.

Aria Clements

I made my gown in two weeks and sewed 5,000 Swarovski crystals onto in.  I'm keeping it forever.

Allison Priest Leonard

It sat in my old closet at my mom's house for 2 1/2 years, and then last weekend, I loaned it to a friend to wear at her wedding! We're about the same size, and she didn't really have a lot of money to get a dress. It was cool seeing someone else wear my dress down the aisle. Now it is back in my closet.

jagam... jagamama0710

It's in my closet. My 4 yr old daughter likes to go in and look at it every now and then. She calls it my "beautiful princess dress" from when "mommy and daddy were a soldier and a princess!".  I have a few military ball gowns hanging next to it but my wedding dress is her favorite. So cute. :) 

kisse... kisses5050

sweetcherry I would love to see your pics!

jagam... jagamama0710

Oh, I love the idea of dress trashing. I don't think I could do that though. lol

Lynette Lynette

lol, it's in the back of my closet.  Been through a few moves and 2 states.

Traum... TraumaRadio

My dress only cost $75 (it was exactly what I was looking for, fit perfectly without alterations, and just so happened to be on a nice clearance rack). It's hanging in a closet at my mom's and I'm not sure what I'll do with it. I suppose I could dye it and use it as an evening gown if I ever had a need for one.

nonmember avatar Cassie

I am going to incorporate mine into a quilt or quilt for my girls. Not sure if it will be a wedding quilt or moving out on your own, but for something memorable. It won't be the center peice of the quilt, but added someone in the details.

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