Tucked away in the corner of my dresser is a little bracelet that reads, "WWSSD." Translation: "What Would Sammi Sweetheart Do?" It sits next to my jewelry box, because, each morning, when I'm putting the finishing touches on my outfit -- aka, m'bling -- I wonder, "How would Sammi complete this look? Would she go cantaloupe-size hoop earrings in gold, or cantaloupe-size hoop earrings in silver?" Decisions, decisions.
So, you bet your ass I was excited as all get-out when I heard that homegirl was now not only a hair extension artisan, she's a jewelry designer for RichRocks, too. Neil Lane, watch out! I mean, what says elegance and class more than a woman in a Juicy sweatsuit, a French manicure, and a bedroom that was trashed by her boyfriend? Me likey the Sammi jewels.
What about her other castmates, though? Sure, Snooki has a best-selling book, and The Situation has a workout video, but they're all such fashion icons -- I think they each need to come out with some stylish crap.
What would they all create? I mean, we know what Sammi and Pauly D. would come out with (hair gel), but if given carte blanche to make their mark on the fashion and beauty world, what would they do? Oh, look at that, I'm in front of a keyboard right now. Why don't I make some fun speculations.
Snooki: Her own thong line. Think about it. You're getting ready for a big business meeting, and you're feeling all stuffy in your stupid business suit. You want something kind of fun underneath, something playful, something Snooki. Slip on a neon green Snooki thong and everything will be A-Okay.
Ronnie: A faux fur coat line. 'Cause dude is a pimp! Remember when he made out with two girls at once in Miami when Sammi was home sleeping. Baller.
JWoww: Her own brand of lip gloss. For your boobs. Why not, right? Anything JWoww does revolves around boobs. She could branch off into boob eyeliner, boob mascara, maybe even boob foundation.
The Situation: Two words: Sports bras. Oh, like you've never thought of that! How dope would it be to strap on a Sitch by Situation (which he totally took from She by Sheree) sports bra before you do your thing on the treadmill. It would provide great support. Because he likes holding the boobies.
Vinny: An eyeglass line. It's kind of hard to think of something silly and crazy for Vinny because he's actually kind of normal, so eyeglasses? No, how about prescription sunglasses? So, you can look cool and still be able to see. Boom!
What do you think of Sammi Sweetheart's jewelry line? What other items could the cast come out with?
Image via Astrid Stawiarz/Getty