Portia de Rossi: New Long Name, New Short Bangs

Portia de Rossi DeGeneres
Portia DeGeneres
Aww, did you hear that actress Portia de Rossi took wife Ellen DeGeneres's last name? The couple married back in August 2008, in that short window of time in which same-sex marriages were legalized in California. And now Portia has made her married name legal.

Portia's new legal name, according to TMZ, is Portia Lee James DeGeneres. No, not Portia de Rossi DeGeneres, which could have been DE-lightful to say over and over.

In any case, while Portia's name definitely got longer, her bangs have gotten shorter, which is what I really wanted to talk about here. And her short-short bangs are cute (as is her fitted boyfriend jacket with blue jeans outfit)! And I'm jealous.

Come, let's discuss my decade-and-a-half yearning for short-short bangs and the short-bang-wearing celebrities who made me want them most.


Oh, how I long to be able to rock the super-short bangs.

Back in the early '90s when Linda Evangelista made short bangs popular again, I tried them. And let's just say I looked like a complete freak. All the good that Linda Evangelista did for short bangs, I took away.

Linda Evangelista
Linda Evangelista
But did that stop me from trying again when Audrey Tautou came on screen with her cute short bangs in Amelie in 2001? No, it did not. I think it was even worse the second time. I should probably send an apology to Audrey Tautou since I actually told people her hair was the inspiration behind the ludicrous mess on my head.

Being able to pull off the shorty bangs seems to have something to do with the eyebrows, if we look at what features these three lovely ladies have in common. If you have pretty, thin, and high-arching eyebrows, the short-short bangs seem to look marvelous. It might just be an all-around adorable face thing, too, but I definitely think there's something about the eyebrows.

Anyway, Portia. Love the new long name and the new short bangs. And for now, that's the long and the short of it ...

Can you rock the short-short bangs? And if so, can I hate you, too?

Audrey Tautou Amelie
Audrey Tautou in Amelie
Images via Jason Kempin/Getty, Elle Portugal, and Miramax Films


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