I have joked a time or two with new mom friends that it would be glorious if we could leave the hospital for a few days after delivering a baby just to recover while the nurses in the maternity ward take care of the child. Never again. For one mom in Greece, the joke has become a reality!

According to reports out of the country that's quickly becoming infamous for financial instability, one new mom didn't have enough money to pay for her C-section. So the hospital decided to hold her newborn baby hostage until she came up with the cash!

Talk about crazy timing. A year and a half after Jillian Michaels announced she was calling it quits as a trainer on The Biggest Loser to pursue motherhood, she finally is a mom. Of twins!

Well, OK, not exactly twins in the two babies born at once who came out of the same tummy sense. I'm talking twins in the "arrived at the same time to meet our two new mommies" sense. There are two, count 'em, two adorable kiddos at chez Michaels now. The fates were certainly smiling on her this month! So how did it go down?

Poor Alanis Morissette is getting some major flak this week after declaring she will be breastfeeding son Ever for, um, ever (oh come on, you were thinking it too). The Ironic singer flamed the fires of the mommy wars when she added her voice to the groundswell of support for attachment parenting in the wake of that awful TIME Magazine cover with one of the dumbest comments yet. Morissette thinks extended breastfeeding will prevent her wee one from having to go into therapy when he's older.

Silly Mommy! Doesn't she know the whole point of parenting is to ensure they have something decent to talk about during their therapy sessions?

There are some weeks and months in which it feels like every single person I know has a birthday. I spend countless dollars and time on cards, gifts, and trying to come up with a witty Facebook post that says something besides "Happy Birthday." Then all of a sudden, nada.

I thought it was just random luck, but it turns out there's a science to it all, as some days are just more popular for births. Weird but true, and this cool interactive chart put together by Andy Kriebel of VizWiz shows which days are the most and least popular birthdays. It's pretty fascinating to play with. You just find your date, then hover over it and it tells you what rank out of 366 (leap day is included) you and your kids' days falls upon.

The most popular day to be born on is September 16, which isn't all that surprising given that's about nine months after the festive holiday season and New Year's Eve, but the least popular day is a bit of a shock. Any guesses as to what it is?

Typically in the headlines for no reason other than sad scandal, Rachel Uchitel today made news for a joyous reason -- the arrival of her first child, a baby girl. Known better as Tiger Woods' number one mistress, Uchitel and her husband, Matt Hahn, welcomed their daughter Tuesday evening.

Saturday was Uchitel's due date, and she tweeted her growing anticipation: "Today is my due date. Spent it swimming laps, taking dogs do the beach and catching up with friends. Now what?!" Three days later her daughter finally arrived, weighing just over 7 pounds; mom and baby are said to be doing great.

They chose a popular name for their little princess. In fact, it came in at number 48 on the Top 100 Baby Names list recently released by the Social Security office. Only it wasn't on the girl's side of the list, but rather on the boy's side. It's ...

Moms and Dads, I'm going to lay it out straight for you. Your newborn baby is ugly. Oh. I know. You think that this little ball of awesomeness in your arms is the cutest thing ever.

So did I. I even leaned over to my husband a few hours after she was born and asked "I don't just think she's cute because she's mine, do I?" But the fact is, babies look like aliens when they are born. All babies. And people are really searching for something nice to say.

So, this year will be my first Mother's Day, and like many first-time Moms, I'm feeling pretty "Go me!" about the whole thing. I mean, I'm a freakin' Mom. A MOM. With two babies that are my own, that will one day call me Mommy, you know, when they can speak. Really?! Really?! It's funny how it still feels almost surreal, how I still sometimes wonder when their Mom is coming to get them. Oh wait, that's me! So weird.

It's been an amazing nine months, full of incredible milestones and teary-eyed challenges, heart-swelling moments and anxiety-inducing self-doubt. For first-time Moms, this year is like baby boot camp, prepping us for a lifetime of all-consuming love and all-consuming hard work. With every day, you learn something new about your little one, watch some new development or discovery, and along the way, discover new things about yourself as well. With that in mind, here are a few things I learned as a first-time Mom...

When I found out that my last child was a girl, I cried. I might have TOLD you it was allergies or dust or something, but that'd have been a lie. I cried because I was so grateful that I'd have a chance at having a daughter. A girl of my own. Something I never thought I'd have.

This is what I want her to know.