Funny Delivery Stories

Cynthia Dermody
newborn baby

Photo by luna_moon

CafeMom Momma_Halo was tired of hearing scary and emotional childbirth stories and posted a Journal asking for funny delivery stories. And moms, um, delivered. Here's a sampling. But you've just got to visit her Journal for the rest because it's Monday. You need to laugh some more.

-- I was given an epidural so the doctor could stop mid-delivery to check the baby's mouth (she'd had a bowel movement in the womb, very dangerous). I was sitting there with only the baby's head out when hubby said something stupid. I started laughing and couldn't stop. 

Finally my doctor told me to stop laughing because I was pushing the baby out and she wasn't ready to catch her yet.  After we were all done, both the doctor and the nurse told us that they have never before uttered those words stop laughing during a delivery before. I was the highlight of their week.

-- I went to the wrong hospital. I delivered at Northside. Yeah, well, l they have three locations! I thought I would deliver in the one closet to my doc's office. NOPE. I had to deliver at the hospital 40 minutes in the other direction. I loved the hospital I went to for the tour. And I'd pre-registered there and everything!

-- Before I gave birth, I was talking to my sister on the phone telling her how many contractions I was having. She's like, "OMG, you're in labor!" I was making tacos and she was screaming at me to call the hospital, I told her, "I'm not going anywhere until I'm done with my tacos." She's like, "How can you think about food when you're in labor?" Well, it was tacos.  

-- My husband did great till the brought the hypodermic for the the episiotomy. DH was standing by my waist and his eyes got HUGE, nearly stumbling and passing out. He then grabbed the bed and pulled his wobbly self up and pants in my face "OMG, did you see the size of that needle?" Then he stumbled and nearly passed out again.

-- When I had my third c-section, I remember laying there terrified and everyone in the room started laughing hysterically. I was so confused and I kept asking "What the h**l is so FUNNY?" over and over because no one would answer me. The only answer I kept getting was "it's ok, it's ok" in between laughs. By the time they brought my son to me they told me: He was breech. None of us had any idea! When they cut me open and pushed on the top of my belly to deliver the head, his legs popped out instead and waved so wildly in the air that they had a hard time catching them. So now it's our little joke that Gavin was born to hit the ground running.

What's your funny delivery story?


Related posts:

Childbirth Tips from a Labor and Delivery Nurse

Did You Have an Orgasm During Birth?

childbirth, slideshow