New Mom Confessions: I Had a C-Section, But I Lie About It

on August 11, 2009 at 6:44 AM

It's hard being a new mom (or even an experienced mom to a new baby) and sometimes we do things we know we shouldn't, despite what all the experts say. But this is a safe place to share your secrets—we won't tell.

This Week's Secret:

"My baby weighed over 11 pounds, and during the delivery he kind of got stuck. My doctor recommended a C-section, but he said he would continue with a vaginal delivery if I really wanted to. I was really scared of the tearing and pain so I said okay to the C-section. I feel so guilty—my boyfriend is the only other person besides the doctors and nurses who know. I tell anyone who asks that I gave birth naturally. — anonymous

We all have secrets and opinions—so thanks to this brave mom for sharing her honest thoughts, and thank you for keeping this conversation nonjudgmental!

Past confessions:

I Took My Baby to a Bar

I Drove My Baby Without a Car Seat

I Forgot My Baby's Name!

I Leave My Twin Babies Home Alone

I Let My Baby Wear a Dirty Diaper

I Wish I Never Had a Baby

About the author Suzanne Murray

is the Parenting & Political editor at The Stir/Moms Matter 2012.

Filed Under: mom secrets

Comments (17)

SpiritedTigress

on Aug 11, 2009 at 7:43 AM

There is NO reason for another person to judge someone else. You havent spent a day in their shoes, you dont know what its like. I'd rather endure 48 hours of absolute hell than get a c-section, but I dont judge others in this manner. Its okay that she lied, if she tells the truth she'll probably just get badgerd and bashed and honestly, what mother needs that? Its no ones business how she gave birth.

*My due date is today!*

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amw529

on Aug 11, 2009 at 8:19 AM

I agree that it's no one's business, but what's wrong with a c-section??? The fact that a medical procedure is "demonized" is the problem here. I had a c-section and I have no problem with it. I feel sad that this mom does feel bad about it.

luchousdiva

on Aug 11, 2009 at 9:19 AM

Its no ones business but yours but why lie? Will they think differently of you? Then they don't really care about you and your baby then. As long as he is healthy then that is all that matters.

mommytobobby

on Aug 11, 2009 at 10:54 AM

i say you shouldn't lie about it, but it's no one's business. and what's the reason for lying?

littleredpony

on Aug 11, 2009 at 11:24 AM

I have not had to have a section but I am thankful that we live in a time and place were it is a safe option. Yes there are risks but there are risks with a vaginal delivery too! But think of how many mothers and babies that have died in the past because this was not an option. All that matters is that you both are happy and healthy. I could care less how you delivered, all I know is that you joined a club with a life long membership that includes all the love, hope, worry and tears that will fill our souls and places in our hearts we never knew we had.

Freela

on Aug 11, 2009 at 11:52 AM

I don't see why you'd lie about it, or feel that you have to. I understand you feel guilt or judged or something like that, but there are PLENTY of issues where you will feel others judge you as a mom. This is the least of them. Why cover it up? It's no one's business but yours and no reason to hide!

Pollymom

on Aug 11, 2009 at 1:02 PM

While I agree that it's no one's business, I certainly wouldn't lie about it. If someone had a problem with my c-section, I would just say, "Well if you think it's so easy to push an 11 pound baby out, then please give it a try."

nily

on Aug 11, 2009 at 7:46 PM

I think you should be honest with yourself first and then with others. A lie is always a bad thing. I do agree that is your business how did you baby was born but instead of lying you could just not answer anyone's question about it. There's nothing to be ashamed of having a c-section you made the choice for your baby to live and be healthy. I rather have a c-section that not having my baby at all because something bad happens to him during delivery. You are not less woman because you couldn't have your baby vaginally you are a BRAVE woman because you put your baby's life first than yours and went under the knife just to have him here save. You should be very proud. You know how my hubby call my c-section scars? My heroism proofs

corinnejenkins

on Aug 11, 2009 at 11:34 PM

I had a csection because my daughters cord was wrapped around her neck. I think I would have been "less of a mother" had I allowed her to be strangled instead of going ahead with surgery that potentially saved her life. The way your child is born is your business,but I don't think it's right to lie about it. Anyone who thinks that I am somehow "less of a mother" for having a csection has no part in my life.

sodapple

on Aug 12, 2009 at 3:00 PM

i lied abut my c-section too and i hate it every moment of it, especially when people would come to me and ask me about my experience giving birth, making one up and try to stick to it, lol this time around i'll tell them what i did and i'll be happy about it.