Get That Sick Baby Away From Me!

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should sick kids go on playdates

photo by lauraslefthook

If your baby has a bug, do you bring her out?

When I worked in an office, it really bugged me when a super-sick co-worker would come to work instead of taking the day off to get better. He or she no doubt thought it showed what a dedicated employee he was. I always thought it was inconsiderate. One by one, the rest of the office inevitably got sick.

Now that I have a baby, there's the risk of something similar happening—a mom brings her sick baby to a group play date or a weekly mommy and me class, and the next thing you know, every baby in town is sick (I live in a small town).

This really annoys LovesBeingAMom7, who thinks sick kids should be kept at home. She started a conversation in The Cafe @ CafeMom asking, "Does it ever make you upset when parents bring their sick child to events? Would you ever say anything or ask someone to leave?"

Most of the moms who responded thought it was obnoxious to bring a sick kid to a social event. Some moms thought there was a difference between being really sick and having a cold (since those can go on for weeks). YuppyMom says sniffles, coughs, and runny noses don't keep her little ones home. But she follows these guidelines, and will not bring her kids out if:

1. They're actively throwing up or have thrown up within 24 hours from some sort of virus. 

2. They have the trots (currently or within the last 24 hours from some sort of virus—eating something bad doesn't count). 

3.  They have a fever above 100.

4.  They have a suspicious rash that could be linked to something viral.

Those seem like good guidelines.

What should you do or say if a sick baby is brought to your house and you do mind?

Mommy Dearest over at lilsugar had this advice for "Sick about  Sickness": "If someone arrives with an ill baby in tow, you might try a little honesty with a soft edge: 'Maybe today isn't such a great day to play. It's pretty obvious that she's not feeling well. We'd be happy to have you over for another play group when she's up to par.'"

How would you handle it if a mom brought her sick baby over to play with your baby?

 

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MoonL... MoonLover06

Doesn't upset me because along with breast feeding it helps build the immune system.  Now if the baby was very sick that's just mean to the sick baby.  Sniffly cold eh.


I go to work sick, like have bronchitis, and I still go.  Why?  Because I'm poor that's why!

fmchavez fmchavez

For a cold? No that's not a big deal. However, if I know there are going to be new babies (less than 2-3 months old) I won't take Mercy if she's sick, even if it is just a cold.


Typically when my baby is sick though, she's miserable and doesn't want to play, so we're stuck at home anyway.

Agent... AgentBrez

when i lived in VA with only 1 kid i had a weekly playdate with 2 other friends i became close to. when one of our kids were sick we would check with each other if it was okay depending on the symptoms. now that i am in a new state, making new friends, so far the moms have not taken their kid to a playdate if they have any sign of sickness. i think it depends on the symptoms and how well you know the people you are meeting up with, maybe they dont care as much as you think they do.

heath... heatherama

I don't think a cold is a big deal but I'd agree to some of the guidelines you mentioned above.

madam... madamekatekate

It bothers me to see mothers out with sick children simply because those babies need to be home resting. You can see in their eyes that they are exhausted and uncomfortable but you *have* to be at Walmart why?


I don't take my daughter out when she's sick because she just doesn't need to be out---why make her so much more uncomfortable than she has to be? (and just for clarification  i mean actually sick with a fever. A small case of the sniffles I don't really care about I just make sure she's not touching other peoples things or children since you never know how they may feel about it. A woman once yelled at me when my daughter sneezed suddenly. She wasn't even sick it was just a sneeze but this woman was sure my daughter had just given her the plague from 10 feet away.)


I don't know that I'd ask a mother who brought a sick baby to a playdate to leave. It wouldn't be me to be so bold. But in all honesty I probably would moniter how much contact my child had with hers.

Trist... TristansMom440

Well, seeing as how this just recently happened to me and my child ended up getting sick as a result...I think it is unfair to the other LOs to bring a sick child to a playdate.  I am not judging anybody...I am just saying.....


 

celine84 celine84

a baby sick should stay home. just because he needs to get better. And also why do you want to the others babies to get sick too ?

Novem... NovemberLove

I have an understanding about both viruses and bacterias and how they work.  I don't think it is any more appropriate for a child with a cold to be around other children than it would be for any other illness.  Especially with babies that can't communicate or describe to you that their throat hurts, or they have sinus pain...why would you think exposure to the cold virus was OK?  Breast feeding does build up the immune system.....to the mother's immunities.  If you are at risk for catching something, so is your baby.  Your baby is at risk for catching it anyway, breast feeding is not an anti-germ, it just HELPS.  I don't understand why a play date with a kid who has been sick for weeks is OK (because we feel bad THAT kid has been sick for a long time?), that's all the more reason for you not to hang out with them...unless you want YOUR kid to be sick for WEEKS too?


Sorry but the fun of one play date isn't worth the possibility of weeks of misery for my child.  I'm better at empathising with my son than that.  Exposure to a moderate amount of germs throughout the day (i.e. not hand washing or sterilizing things excessively) is good for the immune system.  Exposure to people who are infected with illness doesn't strengthen the immune system, it tires it out from fighting against it and makes you more likely to get sick with another illness, even if you don't catch the particular illness you were exposed to.

Novem... NovemberLove

In addition, exposure to the cold virus doesn't help the immune system either lol.  There are SO many strains and mutations of the cold virus out there, catching the cold a few times here and there doesn't protect you against any of the other countless strains.  It does not reduce your risk of catching a cold in the future.

2girl... 2girlsMom.MN

It's extremely rude and disrespectful to knowingly put your sick child in daycare or go to work yourself sick. Breastfeeding doesn't give 100% antibody protection from viruses,colds,flu,infections etc.


So because a parent is to lazy or cheap to take the day off they expose everyone else or their child does?


Do you know how many unpaid days I've had to take off of work because some jerk sent their child to daycare sick therefore my daughter ended up catching it and the daycare called me and told me to pick my sick child up?


If your sick or your child is STAY HOME!  I am responsible and keep my kids home or myself.

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