Mom Slips Out for a Quickie While Friend Is in the Bathroom & 'Assumes' She'll Watch Her Kids

Twenty20

Kids making a mess in kitchen
Twenty20

Offering to take care of your friend's kids is no small favor, but a major disconnect has put two good friends at odds. According to one anonymous woman on Reddit, her friend assumed she was offering to watch her kids when she came over to visit recently -- but the truth is that she really, really wasn't.

  • The Original Poster (OP) went over to her friend's house to drop off some groceries and to use the bathroom.

    As she shared on Reddit's Am I the A--hole forum, after thanking OP for the food, the friend told her that she was going to see her boyfriend soon.

    "She asked what time I was leaving for work and I said an hour but planned to grab some coffee," she continued. "She joked that she had coffee."

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  • Her friend hinted that she hadn't seen her boyfriend in a while "cause kids."

    OP didn't seem to catch what her friend was apparently implying. 

    "I asked to use the toilet. She said take my time," she recalled. 

  • Then the OP's sister called "asking me to bring a pair of shoes [she] left in my car."

    So she called goodbye to her friend, got no reply, and headed out.

    "I then headed out the door to hurry as it was 11:30 and my sister lives a half hour away," she wrote.

  • Around 12:45 p.m. she received a text demanding to know where she was.

    Her friend told her that her 2-year-old managed to break a frame and cut her hand on some glass, and her 10-year-old had made a huge mess. "Where was I?" the text read.

  • Somewhere along the way, her friend got it into her head that the OP had agreed to babysit.

    "I never agreed. I just had to pee," she wrote.

    "I wouldn't have babysat her kids while she had sex with her boyfriend anyways because I have [expletive] to do."

    Now her friend is telling her that she's in the wrong, but "I don't think I am."

  • This situation can be boiled down to one word -- huh?


    "She expected you to watch her kids without asking?" one person wondered.

    "Nah, she was hoping that when you came out of the bathroom, you would see she was gone and would stay because you would feel obligated not to leave the kids alone," a second person guessed. "She attempted to manipulate the situation and it backfired."

    "NTA [Not the A--hole], although I feel like there HAS to be some dialogue missing," one commenter wondered. "I don't understand how she would assume you were coming in to sit for her kids based on the information provided. It makes no sense."

  • The OP responded that there was no mistake.

    "It was literally me walking in to give her groceries, having a quick vent about our life," she wrote. "I complained my boss sucks, she complained that she has the kids so she can't go see her boyfriend as much. I asked to go pee, she asked how long until I had to be in work, and then bounced."

    From what the OP can gather, for some reason her friend assumed that she would understand that she "wanted to have a quickie with her boyfriend before I left the apartment. I assumed that she understood that I was going to get food before work, so I did not plan to stay long," she wrote.

    "I also just figured she was asking because she wanted me to stay a little bit longer to chat, since we don't spend a lot of time together due to the pandemic," she added. "But in my opinion if I have an hour until I need to head into work, which is about 25 minutes away from me, then I don't really have time to chat with you let alone watch your children while you have sex with your boyfriend."

    There really isn't much of an excuse for this type of behavior. The OP added in a later comment that she told her friend's ex about what happened and is hoping he'll take care of it.

    "He picked up the kids," she wrote. "I'm sure he will do something."

child care