People have been having babies since the beginning of time -- hence the whole human race. And people have been using cliches for nearly that long -- hence their cliche status. So you'd think by now someone would have caught onto the fact that just about every saying about "babies" that has wormed its way into the vernacular makes absolutely NO SENSE.
I'm just going to go out on a limb here and say that the first 5,000 or so people who said these things -- ensuring their ubiquity -- weren't actually parents. And now we're stuck with them. Not sure what I'm talking about?
Here they are ... the sayings about babies that don't make a lick of sense (hey, we are talking nonsense cliches)!
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1. Sleeping Like a Baby -- So, what they're saying is "wakes up every hour on the hour to wail at the top of his lungs?"
2. Smoother Than a Baby's Bottom -- I'm assuming they mean a baby's bottom when it hasn't just made a boom boom and joyously squished it all over ... right?
3. Baby Soft Skin -- Two word: baby acne.
4. Stealing Candy From a Baby -- Who gives candy to babies? That's a choking hazard!
5. You're acting like a baby -- So what you're saying is I'm gurgling and cute, and you should take care of me? Gotcha ...
To paraphrase the very best movie ever made, "You keep using that phrase. I do not think it means what you think it means."
What cliches drive you bonkers?
Image via Katelyn Kenderdine/Flickr