Only Rich People Should Have Kids

Say What!? 14

castleWhen I went out the other night I joked on my way to the ATM that I had to go get a huge wheelbarrow full of money to haul back to my sitter at the end of the night. But really, it wasn't that much of an exaggeration -- childcare costs a lot! And that was just for an evening's care. If you're shelling out for daycare it can really add up. According to a new report, many of us are paying more for childcare than food or housing. "The cost of full-time center-based care for two children is the highest single household expense in the Northeast, Midwest and South. In the West, the cost of child care for two children is surpassed only by the cost of housing in the average family budget."

Which just goes to show you this is all my fault. I made one of the biggest parenting mistakes you can ever make. I went and had a kid BEFORE I became rich. What was I thinking?!? Everyone knows you can't have a baby until you've made your first million.

Not that a million dollars makes you rich these days. But you'll scrape by. Really, until you've got seven or eight figures in the bank plus an annual income of, oh, $900,000 you really have no business reproducing. And if you're thinking of having a second child better double those figures. Basically wait until you can make a huge money pile big enough to jump into from out of a fourth-story window of your McMansion. Otherwise, keep swallowing those no-baby pills.

It's not enough to avoid Parenting While Poor. Middle-income people as well have absolutely no business whatsoever starting families. Who do we think we are, bringing another mouth to feed into the world when there's no way we can afford to save up $500,000 for their college education, never mind the tutors and extracurricular activities it'll take to get our kids into college in the first place.

But most importantly, one must consider childcare. Until we create a robot race of highly intuitive childcare providers we will have to keep paying actual human beings to care for our children, human beings who also need things like food and housing and cannot be paid in wampum and Monopoly money. 

This is the world we live in, people. Only the wealthy can afford families. It's kittens and hamsters for the rest of us plebs.

Do you feel like having kids is more expensive now that it was a generation ago?


Image via Dave Stokes/Flickr

childcare, baby first year


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nonmember avatar Jessica

Or..... one parent can stay at home. And before you spout "not everyone can"..... I know. I'm just saying. My husband is a Marine. We make it work.

Elaine Cox

of course it is..but then again so is everything..although thankfully gas is under 3 bucks a gallon this if you decide to have children then add up everything that goes in to it..including the cost

cleig... cleigh717

just bc you have a few million today doesnt mean you will always have it and its safe to have kids. some ppl actually become poor. it can hapn. no gaurantees to life or anything. 

work4... work4mickey

This doesn't apply for when you are at work,but if you can't afford the babysitter, but you could always try doing stuff WITH your children. Perhaps stay home and rent a movie. Read to your kids. Play a board game. Save money by not getting a sitter and by not spending money out.

Oh, and there was a time when most people could count on family for childcare.

momof... momof4and1man

it is is u buy everything new and don't make them earn can certainly afford kids by saving money certain ways..they don't have to have the best of everything....thats crap

Coles... Coles_mom

We had kids when we had an excess of money. Husband owned a booming business. When I was pregnant with my third, my husband's business tanked. We lost our house, cars, and we're nearly a million in debt. We're trying to file bankruptcy and don't even have the money for that. We can't afford diapers or food on the table. Last year at this time, we owned a massive house on a golf course. Now, I literally have to beg for money from my retired mother to afford hot dogs and milk. 

PeterandEmily Fitzgerald

Learn to make a budget. My son only cost $1000 his first year. $5000 for the birth. Kids really don't cost much but you sure can make it so they cost a lot. I already have all the cloth diapers, furnature, clothes and toys from my first son. This time it will hardly cost anything an $3500 for the birth. 

Jaghd810 Jaghd810

If you're going to apply for government assistant to have a baby, then no, you shouldn't have one. 

nonmember avatar anon

Childcare workers get paid crap, even with the top degreesand training. If centers didn't get paid peanuts for subsidized kids maybe the middle-class wouldn't have to pay the difference. Just like I wonder what milk, feral, formula, and eggs would cost if WIC didn't exist to drive updemand.

MrsRo... MrsRoberts413

This is one of the many reasons I am transitioning to become a stay-home mom when our son is born this winter: my income would go straight to childcare!  No point, I'd rather raise our kids myself anyway.

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