Kim Kardashian’s Next Big Project Will Look Fabulous on Your Baby

kardashian baby lineObviously we knew this was coming. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you: The Kardashian Baby Clothing Line. I mean, I'm not literally giving you the baby line -- I'm just letting you know that this is a thing that will happen in the near future. Kim Kardashian said in a recent interview, "I think a baby line is what's next for us, and we definitely would have a lot of experience with what we would need to make that line a success and we're excited about it." Wow. You can almost hear her pen scratching off items on that to-do list: Make baby, birth baby, lose baby weight, get engaged, start baby clothing line ...

I mock. But you know what? I still totally want to see that kidswear line of the Kardashians. Here's what I think they need to make that line a success -- not that they're asking me.

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Kardashian baby models. We want to see Mason, Penelope, and North modeling these clothes, obviously. In fact, we want a show called Penelope and North Take the Pack 'n' Play, which I am fairly certain will somehow become irresistibly compelling television America won't be able to tear its eyes from.

Scott Disick consulting. It's time to make the dandy walking cane a thing for toddler boys. True, there's a risk that your toddler will use it to hit other children, but that's a small price to pay for fashion.

Kanye West consulting. Because it always works out when Kanye picks out your clothes. SHUT UP! I said ALWAYS.

No-makeup look. All the baby models should pose with that makeup-free look, don't you think? Like, still put makeup on them, but make it look all "natural." (Can you put rabbit ears around rabbit ears to indicate an extra layer of irony? Never mind ...)

Bandage dresses out; lace underwear dresses in. Forget what's appropriate for babies to wear because that's so boring. What's more important is knowing that even though bandage dresses have been extremely important to the Kardashian brand in the past, lace underwear dresses are really What's Next.

Aspirational. Basically, it's about clothes your baby would wear if you had an unlimited dry cleaning budget. Also, the K-Dash girls are probably going to pick up ideas from all of Nori West's Paris Fashion Week swag but at a sweatship price point. Fingers crossed that the line will go up to girls' size 14 because then I can dip into it.

What do you think is essential to the Kardashian baby clothing line?

 

Image via E Online

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