8 Priceless Responses to 'You Need to Have Another Baby'

LOL 13

adorable baby feetWhen I talk to other parents of only children, the topic always seems to turn to the latest string of people who have attempted to nose their way into our uteruses (uteri?). It's a cold hard fact: if you are one and done, at least a handful of people have insisted that you have another child. And I do mean insisted!

Since deciding we would stop right here, people I barely know have gone to great lengths to explain to me just why it is that I need to giving my daughter a brother or sister. Lucky for you, all these experiences have given me something extra special: a guidebook to how you should respond when someone tells you your child needs a sibling.

Get ready! This is going to be fun (I promise):

1. OK! Let's make a deal ... you give me the $200,000 to raise it, and I'll do it. I take cashier's checks, but I'm sorry, I don't have a credit card reader.

2. OMG, you mean you can tell I'm pregnant already?! I thought I just looked fat. [Bonus if you have someone with a camera to catch them getting all shifty-eyed sneaking peeks at your belly].

3. You're absolutely right, she does need a sibling. I'll go pack her bags so you can take her to your place tonight. Will she be bunking with your daughter, or will your son be giving up his room?

4. [Leaning over and whispering] Well, I guess it's a good thing I'm ovulating right now.

More From The Stir: 20 Priceless Kid Quotes That'll Inspire You to Record Your Little Ones

5. I didn't now you were running for Congress! [And then when they start protesting] Oh, well, I just figured since you were so concerned about what's going on in my uterus you must be starting up your political career ...

6. You know, I thought that. But so did Cain's parents. And you know what happened to Abel, right? [wink]

7. Well, you know, we tried that ... [hang head and let lower lip droop out]

8. Launch into diatribe about your rat bastard ex-husband [if you're actually still married, this is even more fun].

Do people get ultra personal with you about having another baby? What do you say?


Image via valentina powers/Flickr



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janae... janaeventura

My favorite is #4. Totally doing that every time my inlaws ask.

nonmember avatar MammaMel

LOVE #1...OBSESSED with #5 (totally using it on this annoying chick at church)...and have legit used #8, and bizniches respond "oh, I'm sure you'll find someone else to have a kid with!"...yeah, so your judgey butt can talk about what a skank I am for having 2 kids from two different BabyDaddies (even though I was married to #1...and would be to #2!)

Todd Vrancic

The last time someone asked my wife about when she was going to have another baby (after our third?!?), she told them that the doctor told her she shouldn't have any more and performed a tubal with her last C-section.  They stammered out an embarrassed "Oh, I'm sorry,"  and dropped the subject like a hot rock.

kaley... kaleyplummer

I know sometimes another child just can't happen but I just have to say I really dislike only children. They really don't know how to be around other kids and it annoys me terribly. I have several moms in my life that are one and done and I just cannot stand their children. I know this sounds mean and awful and I am truly sorry I AM offending people who I am sure are awesome, but I needed to vent a little.

Teal Chastain Blacksten

One of my FB friends, who has a baby about 12 months old, was asking for suggestions as to a new hobby she could take up that would b something just for her. We gave her suggestions like, "join a gym," "take up scrapbooking," things like that. Then another of her friends pipes up and says, "Have another baby!" I couldn't believe it! You don't have another child because you're "bored." I thought that response was really nervy.

nonmember avatar Just saying

I just say I love my son, but hate children. It's crazy because they laugh like I'm kidding but I'm really not.

Cryst... CrystalLynne

I had my daughter to my late husband. I since remarried. We have tried for almost two years, and have not conceived. My family is always on us to have another baby, like we haven't tried hard enough or something. On top of that my daughter, who is six, is always asking for a brother. My husband doesn't really care what other people think, but it hurts my feelings. These suggestions could possibly add a little sunshine to my life when they bring it up again.

jenskib jenskib

I get told all the time that "the first one is for you and the second one is for them", them being my son. Yeah, well, unless my 6 year old is going to carry, raise and pay for a sibling...its not happening! My family is great the way it is thanks! I don't know why complete strangers seem to think they should decide for me. And Kaley, you are obviously hanging out with the wrong only children. Sure, mine can be a pain in the butt, but he's also a blast to hang out with and when he plays with siblings he's a great peace maker.

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