I'm Scared of Everything (Especially Flying) Now That I'm a Mom

Mom Moment 12

scared babyI don't think I was ever branded a "laid back" flier before I had my daughter, but I certainly was more pleasant to be around on board than I am now. Once I became a mom, it was like something clicked inside of me. Something that said: Hey, you should be afraid of a lot more things now, m'lady. And flying is definitely one of them. I mean look at that massive hunk of metal up in the air. What the crap is holding it up?

I dread flying now. Dread it. Thus far, I've taken four flights with my daughter who isn't yet 1 year old, and each time, she behaved better than I. Any small bump, shake, or dear god full-blown turbulence, I'm pretty much convinced it's going to end horribly. I don't even want to type how I think it's going to end. I burrow my head into my husband's arm, dig my nails into him, and suddenly find religion. It's a shit show. And that's only one of my exacerbated fears since becoming a mom.

Small things I can handle better. Things I used to be afraid of or just annoyed by before I had a child. Spiders, weird noises in the house, even a mouse once. I go straight into protection mode with stuff like that -- no phumphering for a split second. There was even a time I thought a ghost was in my child's room, and I was fine with it (I know).

But, see, with that kind of stuff, I know I'm not going to die.

From what I hear from others and even a therapist friend of mine, becoming scared/nervous/anxious after you have kids isn't all that uncommon. There's more at stake. I certainly didn't want to die before I had a child, but it wasn't something that was at the forefront of my brain -- because I wasn't leaving a tiny, small, helpless child behind. (Also, to be totally forthcoming, I actually lost my own mother before she was able to see me get married/have kids, and that makes things a lot worse. I've lived through it, and it sucks.)

Have I turned into a hermit? No. I'm well-aware that babies pick up on anxieties and quirks, and I really don't want to pass that down to my child. But I think about scary outcomes/disasters/diseases a hell of a lot more now than I did before. On one hand, it's sort of beneficial, as I'm now always much more conscious of things like my surroundings; the food my family eats; and potential dangers in my home. But on the other hand, it's a pain in the ass. It's no way to live, man.

I'm working on being less "worst case scenario." As I said, it's something I definitely don't want my children to possess. But it's hard for a person who's become hard-wired to think of all sorts of really shitty outcomes to just let go and be all, "Whatever will be will be."

I'm trying, though. For my daughter. 

But as far as the flying things goes, I'm not so sure that's ever gonna change. Wow, it sucks.

Did you become more scared of things after becoming a mom?


Image via barbgabbard/Flickr

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sofia... sofia0587

Yup I became terrified of spiders and heights all of a sudden!

Michi... MichiganMom602

I became much more terrified of things and my surroundings after becoming a mom.  Its the typical "mama bear syndrome."  Its a biological reaction (in most women) to self preserve and guard and protect our offspring. 

MsRkg MsRkg

No nothing changed for me and I didn't become more afraid of anything after I had my son. This is the strangest thing I have ever heard.

early... earlybird11

amazing. i was just telling my dad yesterday how i am much more scared of everything now that my son has been born. i told him i feell like i have pst. Even when my son is in no danger - not even in a dangerous situation, i find myself worried about anything and everything that my crazy mind could concoct to go wrong.

nonmember avatar Emmie

This happened to me with my first kid and it was post-partum depression. Instead of laying on the bed, not showering, and crying - it manifested itself as anxiety. I'd see your doctor.

nonmember avatar Tracey

hi, this has happened to me. i call is post pardum anxiety. i am afraid to die and worry every day. as far as flying i have an easy natural fix. it is bach flower essense. you need to use the proper ones and they work. i am still working on bach for my anxiety and playing with the mix so its not 100% yet however you may contact a bach specialist and they can help you. for flying you need to buy mimulus and rescue remedy. you can either do under tongue or drops in your water. i start taking the mix 2-3 wks prior to my flight and obviously while im away until i return. if you do direct just put a few drops of each every time you feel anxious about it. it is very strange but works. you dont care that you are flying. you are obviously not excited but dont care. its wonderful. if you want to mix it in a bach mixing bottle you put i would say half of the dropper of each into the mix bottle then add one teaspoon brandy to preserve and then fill rest of bottle with spring water. you do the same every time you think of it you use it. this is all natural no side effects safe for animals babies nursing and pregnant. the brandy is absorbed by the body and non harmful as it is extreme small amounts. good luck!

nonmember avatar NoWay

I was like this when my kids were little, but now that they are older and more self sufficient, I know they would be ok if I was not around to take care of them. Not that I WANT to die, but it doesn't scare me as much. When they were babies, it was another story entirely!

nonmember avatar Samantha

There are a lot of things i fear now, before i was care free & took more risks, but now im much more conscious of the dangers in the world. As she gets older, i relax more, but its not easy.

amiec... amiecanflie

I'm the opposite! I've tried more "out there" things since my son is born because I know that if I can be a mom, I can do(almost) anything! I'm going xip lining this summer even though I'm terrified of heights but I'm excited :]


 

nonmember avatar Kdelano

I know exactly what youre talking about! I live in south korea (hubs is military) and actually gave birth to my daughter here. Before she was here, the threat from north korea didn't really bother me, we have gas masks and an evacuation plan in case something did happen. But now that my daughters here, I can't wait to move back to the states.every little thing I hear about noko makes my anxiety skyrocket and makes me double and triple check our emergency evac bag and plans. Not fun!

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