We all know babies are cute. But did you know this little-known fact? Babies are also GROSS. True story. Tell your friends.
Poor Biggest Loser trainer Jillian Michaels discovered the dark side of babies the hard way. Tricked into mothering not one, but two children, she was horrified to discover that her babies do disgusting things like vomit all the time. "Oh my God, the puking!" she told Us Weekly. "I did not anticipate how much a child under 1 throws up! Every day. Every day!" She says she's been told babies stop that after a year. (Mwahaha!) "But there isn't a day that I don't get projectile vomited on." And you don't even want to know about the exploding diapers.
But she'll tell you anyway. Once when she took her son, Phoenix (now 8 months old), to a check-up at the pediatrician's, his poo-loaded diaper exploded all over the doctor's wall. EPIC. The doctor tried to assure her that he had kids, too -- been there, done that. But Jillian says she "died that day" and has been too embarrassed to go back.
Don't we all have stories like that?
Before you become a parent, you hear that parenting is "hard" and babies can be "difficult." But you just don't realize what it all means until you're actually in charge of a little one. That sweet cherub is a never-ending spewing volcano of gross, smelly fluids. Spit-up, vomit, pee, poo, snot, rejected baby food -- all of it! And the drool. My son didn't have a dry face until he was about 2-and-a half years old, I swear. And it was years before I dared to wear white.
Okay, but that said, there's a normal amount of vomiting and then there's the kind of vomiting you should be a little worried about. Here's the 101 on infant vomiting from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Oddly enough, they don't explain how to get protein-rich vomit stains out of your brand-new running leggings. You're on your own there, Jillian.
Were you surprised at how "gross" babies can be, or did you already expect that?
Image via Pacific Coast News