Ban on Adoptions of Russian Children by American Parents IS a 'Tragedy'

Heartbreaking 18

cribRussian president Vladimir V. Putin made headlines around the world today when he said he will sign a law banning the adoptions of Russian children by American citizens. He made headlines for a number of reasons, mostly political (the ban is said to be Putin's retaliation against an American law punishing Russians accused of violating human rights). But as a mom, I find the personal implications of this ban to be the most devastating. In a statement, Russian child rights commissioner Pavel Astakhov said that 46 children already chosen by American parents -- "46 children who were seen, whose paperwork was processed, who came in the sights of American agencies" -- will "not be able to go to America, to those who wanted to see them as their adopted children."

He added, "There is no need to go out and make a tragedy out of it.”

He couldn't be more wrong.

I didn't adopt my two children, so I can't speak from experience on this topic, but still ... I just can't imagine what the American parents of these 46 children are going through right now. Anyone with the slightest knowledge of how complicated, lengthy, and frustrating the process of adopting a child can be knows what the "paperwork was processed" really means: It means the nursery was already painted. It means the car seat was already installed. It means the clothes were already folded in drawers, waiting to be worn. It means, above all, that the parents were already in love. The parents were already parents! 

It's just heartbreaking. And what about the children? What happens to them now? No need to make a tragedy out of it?? It already IS a tragedy. And I'm so sorry for everyone involved.

Do you have any experience with adoption? Do you think this situation is tragic?


Image via Janine/Flickr

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bills... billsfan1104

I think it's horrible, but we have hundreds of kids here in America that need adoption. I don't like Rosie O'Donnell, but at least she adopts American kids.

kelti... kelticmom

Do you have ANY idea how hard and expensive it is to adopt an American child? I am adopted myself. Back in the 80's it cost my parents almost $10,000. Most couples want babies, which are easier to get, so older kids sit in foster care sometimes until they age out at 18, then it's on to the streets with them. Not to mention there is too much money to be made off the foster care system. It's not like a couple who wants to adopt in the US can just go get one of the "hundreds of kids" next week. Private adoptions are easiest, but good luck getting a child already in the system. I've seen so much heartbreak with potential parents being turned down bc they are "too old" or "they don't make enough to adopt", yet foster parents don't have to meet that same criteria. Not to mention birth mothers coming back weeks later and wanting the baby back. Foreign adoptions are just easier most of the time.

bills... billsfan1104

Keltic, I didn't say it was easy. I think we need to revamp our adoption process, so that it is easier and not so expensive. But there are so many kids here. I wish I could adopt them all, but I can't. It is so sad.

kelti... kelticmom

I agree. But until a major overhaul on the American adoption process is started, foreign adoption is a quicker choice for hopeful parents. Personally, I believe giving any child a home, regardless of nationality is a wonderful thing. Not to mention, compared to orphanages in Russia, Asia, Africa, South America, most of our foster kids have it made. I've been in some in El Salvador, and it changed my life. They all deserve loving homes, but our government needs to stop making it so hard for that to happen.


I really think this has more to do with the woman who sent the kid back to Russia by himself because she didn't want him anymore. Also other countries do adopt Russian children,America isn't the only country on the map. Kinda sounds like we are entitled to everything, even other countries children if we want them.

mothe... motherof2inFL

this is so heartbreaking.  those poor children and parents who thought they were getting forever families.  :*(


sofia... sofia0587

Although its sad we have so many kids here in need of a family, I was adopted out of Mexico at 3 months but I myself would want to adopt here in the U.S because there are so many babies in need of a home and family.

jalaz77 jalaz77

I was kind of thinking the the same thing PRIMA.

Bad thing about America is everyone is trying to make money and the expense of adopting, surrogacy, IVF is outrageously expensive. I don't have experience with adoption but know that it's expensive in America.

nonmember avatar guest

kelticmom have you ever actually looked into adoption costs? Foreign adoptions like those from Russia and Ukraine cost upwards of $20,000 on average and parents have to make multiple extended trips to the country they are adopting from. they have to fill out paperwork that can take months to complete and many countries already have laws that infants are not available for other countries unless they are special needs. Older child (older than 2 or 3) adoptions in the US can be done for little to no cost and a much shorter wait list. I am not saying parents shouldn't adopt children from another country it's just not as simple as you make it sound.

ShelleyC ShelleyC

there are THOUSANDS of children in the US that need families!!  And it is NOT as hard as everyone thinks.  We adopted our daughter, she is from right here in our hometown. Took approx 1 yr and she is 20 months old now

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