I thought I knew what guilt was. Then I had a baby. Wow, can being a mom make you feel like a crappy person every now and again. We want to be the absolute very best for our children all the time, and, well, sometimes that's not possible. We have bad days; we get frustrated; we compare ourselves to other moms; we get mad at ourselves for not doing it all.
But it doesn't have to be that way. Seriously. Your life as a parent can be so much easier -- and happier -- if you know that sometimes, you just gotta say what the f**k.
Here are six quick ways moms can make their lives much easier -- and happier!
Stop comparing your kid to that kid. Think about it: Do you and your friends all have the exact same talents and the exact same set-backs in life? Um, no. Because you're human. And so are your babies! So don't expect everyone to do everything at the very same moment. And, dude, seriously. Do you honestly believe that your friend's 3-month-old is fluent in French and plays the violin and backed up all her computer photos on her external hard drive? I mean, honestly, what 3-month-old has an external hard drive? Your friend is lying!
And while we're at it, choose your friends wisely. A person who judges you isn't fun. A friend who judges the kind of mom you are = way less fun. A true friend is someone who doesn't care that your sink looks like it just vomited up a pile of dirty dishes.
Stop feeling guilty when you're having fun -- without your kid. The first few times I left my baby for a few hours -- and actually did something fun for myself -- I felt a little guilty. But then I had a glass of wine and instantly felt better. Seriously: Your baby and you are not the same person. You are allowed to go enjoy yourself away from him once and a while. (He will go to school one day!)
Stop feeling guilty if you don't look like you did before you had a baby. It's a hard pill to swallow. Nobody likes looking in the mirror and seeing a tired, doughier, less vibrant version of themselves staring back. But you just grew a human inside of you. And then had said human come out of your vagina/surgically-removed. It's alright if you're not looking your best these days. And don't worry, you will again soon. Promise.
Accept help. Only people who are positive they want to watch a crying, pooping, spitting up kid offer to do so. And trust me, you'll be a much more peaceful person if, every once in a while, you sneak in a pedicure or a nap.
Stop reading the comments on "mom blogs". Hey, those probably won't make you feel very good, now will they?
What have you done to make things easier on yourself?
Image via Varin Tsai/Flickr