Remember the mom who took the mommy wars to the cover of TIME Magazine back in May with that photo of her toddler son breastfeeding while standing on a chair? Jamie Lynne Grumet is baaaaack! This time we get to see her breastfeeding her 4-year-old on the cover of an actual parenting magazine (but at least she let him lie down and get comfy). As if we really needed another shot of her breastfeeding?
Paired with another tagline clearly intended to rile women up: "Mom Enough to Speak Out for Attachment Parenting" (it's a take-off of TIME's incendiary "Are You Mom Enough" coverline), the photo on the cover of Pathways to Family Wellness is actually rather sweet. Mom Grumet lays with her husband wrapped around her, their youngest son at her breast, their oldest son peeking in from behind dad. If only this were the only shot of her we'd ever seen.
With magazine cover two, Jamie Lynne Grumet has gone from "breastfeeding advocate" to "woman who wants to make sure everyone gets a look-see at her breastfeeding." She's crossed a line that makes it hard for moms who support breastfeeding as a whole to defend her.
Because Jamie Lynne isn't "just" breastfeeding. She isn't "just" breastfeeding in public either. She's making the act of breastfeeding into a spectacle, splashing it on magazine covers, trying to make some sort of point about how fabulous she is.
But that's more or less the opposite of what moms who breastfeed in public are looking for, isn't it?
From what I can tell, breastfeeding moms are looking for acceptance. They're looking to fit in. They're looking, if you really think about it, to be ignored.
Moms simply want the ability to sit in a restaurant or a park or a courthouse or a library and feed their child without anyone saying anything, without anyone giving them dirty looks. The idea is for breastfeeding to be a non-issue, just a part of the daily grind. After all, it's a kid getting something to eat, right? What's so strange about that?
I sat with a breastfeeding mom on Friday night in a public space -- our local ice cream stand. I ate my ice cream. Her son ate his breast milk. And we carried on a conversation as if nothing unusual was going on. Because, well, it wasn't. Her son was hungry. He ate. I didn't stare at her chest because who has a conversation with someone while staring at their chest?!
That's what breastfeeding in public is all about: being able to function in society and being able to function as a mom, all at the same time. It's not about getting people to pay attention to the fact that you're breastfeeding. But that's just what Jamie Lynne Grumet seems to be all about.
Where do you draw the line between fighting for the right to breastfeed in public and actually making a spectacle of the fact that you're breastfeeding? Has Jamie Lynne Grumet crossed your line?
Image via Pathways to Family Wellness
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Comments 55
That picture is tastefully done, the other one she did was just weird. nothing wrong with breastfeeding if we were not suppose to we would not produce the milk!
Ironically, Ms. Grumet was scheduled to be a guest on the Dr. Phil show today. I know this because I was scheduled as one of the parenting experts for the show. My role as a psychologist was to talk about the psychological abuse inherent in this form of extreme parenting. When I showed up on set, the producer informed us that Ms. Grumet backed out of coming to the show due to illness. The show went on without her. I talk about the false propositions being presented as facts about this self centered parenting philosophy here:
http://www.themommypsychologist.com/2012/09/12/jamie-grumet-was-a-no-show-for-dr-phil/
I have absolutely no problem with a picture of a woman breastfeeding on a magazine cover. It doesn't bother me like the Cosmopolitan magazine covers with scantily clad women and lines about "naughty sex". The part that creeps me out is that the child is four. I have a four year old, and I can't even imagine...
I think Jamie is amazing. She seems like a good mom. She is doing what comes naturally. She is doing what women in third World countries do, with no questions. AND she is making money to support her family. You go Jamie! BTW. Her kids will turn out just fine. My daughter breastfed until she was three. She's a happy, healthy, well-ajusted 8 year old now. Because of watching me breastfeed, my 22 year old daughter has successfully breastfed her baby for 10 months, and my boys will be supportive of their wives breastfeeding. Oh, and my brother's wife ended up breastfeeding her second child until he was four because of my example. He's well adjusted , smart, and doing fabulous in pre-school. So, no. Breastfeeding a four year old is not going to scar them for life.
Jamie is having trouble letting go of these moments.