No mom ever thinks she will be the one who leaves her baby in a hot car all day. But we have another sad and tragic story today out of Nashville, Tennessee, where a 5-month-old baby boy died in the back of his mom's minivan. It will break your heart, Moms and Dads, but keep reading. There's a lesson in here that could save your baby's life.
Police say Stephanie Gray arrived at her son's daycare on Tuesday afternoon to pick him up. Only little Joel wasn't there because he'd never been dropped off.
According to the cops, it appears the boy spent the entire day in the back of his mom's minivan. The baby's death has been described as "heat related."
But get this. Tuesday would have been baby Joel's SECOND day at daycare. You know what that means? This was not a routine for this mom of four. What was probably routine was taking her three older kids to school -- which she did on Tuesday before driving home, seemingly forgetting little Joel in the backseat and never making it to the daycare.
When you're a mom, especially mom of a baby, routines are everything. They keep us functioning when we've had so little sleep we can barely stand up. The little stuff (ahem, showering, washing the dishes), might not get done, but as long as you've got a routine down for the big stuff, your body can function on a sort of auto-pilot.
But when the routine is changed, big things can happen, disastrous things. Just look at what happened for Stephanie Gray. The cops say she was rushed to the hospital after the discovery of her son's body. It doesn't sound like she was some uncaring idiot. It sounds like she genuinely forgot. And I'm going to wager it's because the daycare drop wasn't routine yet; her body couldn't guide her to get it done.
It's a tragic mistake. But you're kidding yourself if you think it could NEVER happen to you. Routines change. We forget things. Whether it's a baby in a hot car or turning the coffee pot off, it's human.
Moms! Dads! If your routine is going to change, please be hyper vigilant with your kids. It could save their lives!
Have you had a routine change in your busy parenting life? What has fallen through the cracks?
Image via jurvetson/Flickr
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Comments 382
There is NO excuse for this. Nothing is understandable!
Honestly the comments here are over the top.
Sure, in her day to day she probably thought 'Oh wait, where's my baby!?!' per her normal routine of him being right there. But then, because she had meant to drop him off in day care, her brain would have responded 'In day care' and she would have breathed a sigh of relief.
Because, its not like any normal person forgets their kid in the car right? is what all of us would think in that situation. Even if we did. Not a one of us could believe we did that even though in this scenario it's TOTALLY PLAUSIBLE. We'd be like 'Did I drop the baby at Daycare? Of course I must have! Otherwise they'd be right here next to me!'
And seriously- are some of you not mothers? Infants can sleep incredibly quiet. Long enough for the ride home. And a person who just died isn't going to make a ruckus to alert you either, and hasn't had to chance to emit any smell. Seriously people. If you expect other to use their brain, try not to forget using yours.
Sure, it's probably normal for most of us to do a quick check through the car before we get out. We know she wasn't expecting a baby back there, and who knows if she was rushed or not. She lost her baby. She has enough guilt. Lets leave that poor woman alone now.
I'm sorry there is NO excuse forgetting your child. I have only had 1 baby but raised my oldest (step daughter) since she was 6... I didn't EVER forget my baby and I had a van...I was a new mom/tired mom/only me as hubby worked and I NEVER forgot she was there sleeping or not. It's unacceptable for ANYONE let alone a mother to forget...
Otherwise, we're left to assume that she 'forgot' to take him to daycare, and then just 'forgot' she still had him. That seems like a lot of forgetting for any parent. If that's the case, how did she manage the first 3?
There is a great burden of responsibility for both parties on this part of the issue-