Since it's only been about 5 minutes since the last mom-related controversy exploded, inspiring women everywhere to take sides against each other while secretly doubting the validity of their own positions: Enter the heated debate over "regressive" moms. Brought to our attention by writer Amy Sohn, who recently wrote a piece promoting the release of her upcoming novel "Motherland" introducing this new class of modern mommy, "regressive" moms are older moms "avoiding the big questions -- Should I quit my job? Have another child? Divorce? -- by behaving like a bunch of crazy twentysomething hipsters." What exactly does said behavior look like?
Apparently, "masturbating excessively, cheating on good people, doing coke in newly price-inflated townhouses, and sexting compulsively -- though rarely with our partners." Oh.
Yeah, I'm not buying it. And this is why ...
I'm not arguing that moms who fit this description don't exist. I'm not judging the ones that do exist. I'm just saying this kind of behavior is nothing new, and it has nothing to do with being a mom.
The "regressive" mom trend is no more or less than an exaggerated, sensationalized take on the female midlife crisis. We just never really talked about the female midlife crisis before -- at least not in this tell-all, button-pushing way. So what's being exposed here, exactly? Women face the same sort of identity-questioning midlife transition that men do? Women are people, just like men! Mothers face the same sort of identity-questioning midlife transition that men do? Mothers are people, just like women!
In my opinion, the concept of "regressive" moms is a cultural cheap shot -- an attempt to start yet another pointless battle in the already pointless mommy wars (if I have to type "mommy wars" one more time in my life I think I'm gonna scream). So what, now moms whose greatest vice is a glass of chardonnay at Sunday brunch get to sit back and feel smug and wholesome? Or insecure husbands get to sit back and feel validated for being suspicious, controlling jerks?
I'm not sure I even understand who's fighting this particular battle. But it seems like everybody's going to end up losing.
Do you think the "regressive mom" stereotype is all hype?
Image via Jose Roco/Flickr