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Heartbreaking

Mom Wants You to Honor Her Dying Baby By Giving Your Kids Ice Cream for Dinner

by Jeanne Sager on June 19, 2012 at 2:56 PM

banana splitNeed a reason to stop being the stressed out mom who can't stop running around like a neurotic nelly? How about to honor a baby who is dying? Born with Down syndrome and a heart defect, 21-month-old Ryan Roberts isn't expected to reach his toddler years. And all his mom wants the other moms (and dads) of the world to do for her today is skip dinner tonight and throw a banana split ice cream party with their own kids.

Just reading her simple request filled me with mommy guilt. I am always saying I want to do "Mommy and Me" time with my daughter. But saying it and doing it are two different things.

I know I don't do simple stuff like that often enough. And really, Ryan's mom Diane is right on with her plan to spread Ryan's Banana Split Party around the world:

I said, just go create a memory with your kids. Just go put a banana split down in front of your kids for dinner and watch their faces light up. No chicken, rice, and broccoli tonight, just ice cream. They're going to remember that forever.

More from The Stir: Facebook Deletes Photos of Mom's Dying Baby & Shows Its Heartless Side Again

She's right, isn't she? Being a good mom is not in the stuff we buy. It's not in the trips we take. It's in the stuff that moms whose babies don't make it would give their left arm for.

It's kicking a soccer ball around the backyard instead of doing laundry. It's letting them eat ice cream instead of broccoli ... just this once. It's that extra story at bedtime instead of heading back to the TV.

If a mom can live knowing that her baby boy is going to die and still have the strength to inspire other parents, trust me, you can put all your worries and stress aside for an hour tonight. Skip dinner. Throw an ice cream party. You'll be smiling about it for weeks.

When is the last time you threw caution to the wind and just enjoyed time with your kids? What did you do? Will you honor Ryan with ice cream tonight?

 

Image via Edward Allen L. Lim/Flickr

Filed Under: baby health, bonding

Comments

25
  • Trace...
    -- Facebook comment from

    Tracey Plummer

    June 19, 2012 at 3:04 PM

    My daughter's favorite thing in the world is donuts. When my grandpa passed away, she had a really hard time with it, so we picked a night and I bought a dozen donuts, in every color of the rainbow, with and without sprinkles, and we rented some movies. We plunked ourselves down on the couch and laughed and joked and had a blast. Sometimes you just have to let the rules go and have some fun.


  • the4m...
    --

    the4mutts

    June 19, 2012 at 3:18 PM
    I actually did this last night. Just because. They had cookie, icecream, and chocolate syrup for dinner. Then played in the sprinklers and had otter pops for dessert.
    We do this kind of thing about once a month. Just to remind ourselves that structure isn't what life is made of.
    Plus, if that once a month, coincides with MY once a month, even better LoL

    I am sorry for this mother and what she is going through. But her message is an important one. Let go of the routine, the structure, and the "rules" once in a while. Realize that there are more important things. My heart goes out to her.
  • MomLi...
    --

    MomLily67

    June 19, 2012 at 4:08 PM

    I love to surprise my daughter with a day of doing as you please, we both enjoy it very much. She specially loves having ice cream or cake for breakfast.


  • RanaA...
    --

    RanaAurora

    June 19, 2012 at 4:14 PM

    Sure we'll do it. :)


  • dirti...
    --

    dirtiekittie

    June 19, 2012 at 4:25 PM

    oh bugger, i hate being such a sap. i totally have tears in my eyes. this mother is very brave, to be thinking of others too at a time like this. but she makes absolute sense.

    we'll be having ice cream tonight... after dinner - but not because i'm a spoilsport, but because my oldest daughter (8) leaves for the midwest tomorrow to spend the summer with family and she asked for "special" dinner tonight since it's her last night at home for a couple of months. we'll be having cheese ravioli with extra cheese on top and a big bowl of ice cream for dessert! :)


  • mamel...
    --

    mamelmel3

    June 19, 2012 at 4:41 PM
    Count us in! :-)
  • Rebec...
    --

    Rebecca7708

    June 19, 2012 at 6:04 PM
    Oh, I am definitely doing this with my boys.
  • Chris...
    -- Facebook comment from

    Christine White

    June 19, 2012 at 9:15 PM
    My boys are currently enjoying a big ol' banana split for dinner. What a great idea! Truly one they will remember for ever.
  • yngmo...
    --

    yngmomma21833

    June 19, 2012 at 9:46 PM

    I will do this tomorrow. Only because I have no ice cream tonight.


  • Emily
    -- Nonmember comment from

    Emily

    June 20, 2012 at 9:21 AM
    When my first daughter was born she was in the nicu for a while. She pulled through but there was another baby wrist didn't and I would walk by this kids. Ed everyday. The family was always there and it broke my heart. And every time she cried or gave me a hard time I thought ' that family would give everything to be going through what I'm going through' so it never bothered me. Now I have a few more kids and we have girl night three times a week. Love spending time with my babies.
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