Mom Moment
Katherine Heigl's Advice for New Moms About Sleepless Nights Is Spot On
Perspective is a beautiful thing, isn't it? And Katherine Heigl served up a healthy dose of it this weekend. Now the mother of two thanks to the recent adoption of newborn Adelaide, she has a message for new moms everywhere.
Forget the poopy diapers and the sleepless nights. Just be grateful you have them. She and husband Josh Kelley might already be parents, but they never GOT to do this stuff before!
Heigl confessed to People that she's a whole different parent this time around with baby Addey (as they're calling her), and part of it is because she and Kelley adopted daughter Naleigh as a 9-month-old:
I had never had a newborn before. I didn’t really have that experience. So it’s all been new. I was prepared for the nights and having to get up and all of that. But the beauty of it is it’s really only a few months of your life that you’re walking around like a zombie because you haven’t slept.
I couldn't help being struck by that.
I would have been perfectly fine listening to Heigl moan about being exhausted. I would have identified and felt sympathetic. Once you've been through that time, you are marked by it because of how HARD it is. Anyone who says they never hated a moment of the newborn year is lying to themselves.
Babies scream and cry and pee and poop and demand food, and you have no clue what in the heck they want, and you haven't slept in weeks, and all you want to do is curl up under your comforter and refuse to come out for a solid 48 hours, but you can't!
Which is exactly why we need comments like Heigl's to remind us why we do this whole parenting a baby thing. We need someone to take us by the shoulders, look us deep in the eyes, and say, "Hey, you in there, you don't have to be a parent. You get to be a parent. How awesome is that?"
It's easy to whine and complain and ask for pity from the rest of the world because, "OMG, I have a newborn, and it's sooooo much work." But here Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelley are, right in the middle of one of the hardest years of parenting, and they're still able to say, "Hey, you know what, we're OK with it!" If they can do it, you can do it. Trust me.
Do you feel yourself getting caught up in the pity poor me attitude about the infant stage? How do you get out of that rut?
Image via friskytuna/Flickr
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Stacey.
My daughter slept through the night from a few weeks old, and would wake up around 6am. Me and her dad took turns getting up with her for the 6am feeding and then she'd go back to sleep until it was time for me to go to work. I never felt that "zombie" stage everyone talks about. She also only cried if she was hungry or needed changed so it was always a quick fix. I loved every single minute of her being a newborn and wish it lasted for at least 2 years, I feel like it went by waaaaaaaay to quick.
Stacey.
I also think the newborn stage took the LEAST amount of work. Feeding a baby milk and wiping a bum a few times a day is so much easier than dealing with a toddler who gets into everything, always wants to walk everywhere, and throws tantrums at the drop of a hat.
TorranceMom
happymama0609
Lol I agree with Stacey, the infant stage was super easy. Once he hit toddler is when everything went crazy around here.
PAmommy32
I appreciate Katherine's point of view that it only lasts a short while. It does. However, a 9 month old baby is not a new born and is not comparable in how a newborn sleeps, eats, or poops. A totally different ball game altogether.
jalaz77
TorranceMom-why does that matter?? Really no need to go there. I was no more tired after 2 vag births and 1 c/s.
Katherine is right, it is a small part of your life. Babies to me are the easiest for me too Stacey, agreed. I think for her you can compare a newborn to her 9 mo baby. This baby is new to her, the baby has to readjust from what he/she was in before, adjust to a new environment and parents which to me would be more difficult that a newborn.
Melissa042807
During the sleep deprivation phase I just repeat a mantra to myself a lot: "It's just a phase...it's just a phase...it's just a phase..." Life just feels a lot harder when you're running on zero sleep. My new baby is almost 6 weeks old now and is starting to be more consistent at night. It's still hit-or-miss but he'll give us a good stretch of sleep most nights.
Nicole
calimom73
I agree that it goes by quickly and those of us who are able to have children should feel blessed, however the first few weeks when you have: One been pregnant for 9 months & Two just gave birth and are healing I think is a lot harder than an adoptive mom. God bless people who adopt. I'm not trying to jab at anyone but mom's healing time throws a whole different spin on it. Also by 9 months my daughter was sleeping 10-12 hours straight.
Faith Pinto
See, what I took from her comment was a little different. I interpreted it as saying Yeah, this is hard, but it's only months out of your entire life with your child. 9 months of pregnancy plus 30-some hours of labour plus a couple years of really hard work with a newborn then a toddler, but then you get a lifetime with your kid. I think she's just saying that in the end, it'll be worth it, which is something we all already know :)