Baby Raves Celebrate the First Birthday With Ecstasy Cookies!
Think the Sweet Sixteen parties have gotten out of control? Wacky parents are throwing raves for their babies. Because nothing screams baby like someone so high they suck the toxic crap out of their glow bracelets and get rushed to the hospital, right?
Whatever happened to making sure parties "for" your kid were actually kid-appropriate? I know your baby may not understand the drug culture references right now, but guess what folks: the rest of the neighborhood does. And we're rolling our eyes at you.
This bit of crazy came to light on STFU Parents last week, complete with links to a mom's Pinterest board where you too can develop a plan to mark your innocent infant's first birthday with the kind of dance party that traditionally ends when the cops show up. She says the "e" cookies were a joke, but I'm not so sure. And I'm even less sure that parents will find this whole thing as horrifying as I (and STFU's writer) do.
It turns out baby raves have been a "thing" for quite awhile. Parents throw these little black light and loud music events because they think it's just so darn cute, and gee, a baby doesn't get it!
Ahem. Babies are still human beings, folks. They aren't toys.
Throwing any party "for" your kid with a wildly inappropriate theme shows this event isn't about your kid at all. It's about you living out some of fantasy with your kid as a prop.
So you're sick of Elmo, princesses, and doggies? Good for you. Your kid isn't. They're pretty new to the world, and they're just starting to actually start to pay attention to things, and actually getting to eat something other than what comes out of your boob, and goshdarnit, this is their party. Just look who is in the center of all the pictures ... the pictures they're going to be looking at in a few years. (Which do you think will be easier to explain to your 6-year-old as they pore through the babybook: Those ecstasy cookies or why there was Elmo cake all over their face?)
Where do you draw the line on "adult" at a baby's party?
Image via nickstone333/Flickr
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