3 Baby Photos You Should Stop Sharing (And 3 We Need More Of)

LOL 60

OMG, that picture of your baby is so cuuuuute! And that one! What a darling little outfit! Look at those cheeks! How can you stand it, I just want to eat him up right this minute! I think my ovaries are exploding! I just spontaneously lactated and, and—oh. Oh dear. Um, that photo ... not so much.

The truth is, not every single baby photo is a keeper. Or, more accurately, they're all keepers (who actually bothers to delete anything from their photo libraries, right?), but some are less share-worthy than others.

Here, presented with kindness and just a smidgen of tough love, are three types of baby photos that don't need to make their way to Facebook:

VISIBLE POOP

Ha ha ha, it's so HILARIOUS that your baby had a
giant blowout while he was in his jumpy chair and now there's a splatter of feces all over the floor and he's stepping in it, haaaaa! Except OH MY GOD THAT ISN'T FUNNY AT ALL. In fact, it's disgusting. Ditto poop leaking from diapers, poop soaking out the butt of a onesie, poop on the changing table, poop floating in the tub, and any and all visual evidence of human excrement—with the sole exception of Baby Poop Face, where what you're seeing is the exertion, not the result.

As mothers, we're exposed to poop every day. We are not delicate flowers who faint at the sight of a bodily fluid. That said, isn't it enough that we have to get up close and personal with our own children's poop? DO NOT FORCE YOUR CHILD'S POOP IN MY EYES.


FOODFACE INSANITY


Judging by the 10 billion photos I've seen of babies joyously cramming spaghetti in their hair, I may be in the minority when I say that an image of a
food-covered baby makes me involuntarily lunge for the wet wipes. It's just ... maybe it's an OCD thing, I don't know, but a face smeared from top to bottom with some sort of gelatinous substance—yogurt? Pudding? Who can tell?—isn't remotely cute to me. I know, I know, Junior is just mastering solid food and you want everyone to enjoy his newfound ability to mash wet half-chewed lumps of Mystery Meal into his various facial orifices, but blaaaaaarrggh.

SPIT-UP


All I can say is I lived the spit-up stage through two children and I didn't think it was adorable then and I sure don't now. That
whitish cheesy mess coming out of your baby's mouth? NOT PHOTOGENIC. Thank god Facebook's photo sharing doesn't yet include scratch 'n' sniff is all I can say.

Not that I've alienated everyone by sounding like a total baby Grinch, here are three types of photos I can't get enough of:


BABIES SURREPTITIOUSLY FLIPPING THE BIRD


Because haaaaaaa.
Love those.

CLOTH-DIAPERED BUTTS


You know, as long as there isn't poop erupting out of one of the leg-holes.


COMICALLY STARTLED BABIES


Oh yeah. Bring it on, Comically Startled Babies:



What's your take on baby photos—are they cute no matter what, or are some less adorable than others?



Images via Linda Sharps, Flickr/anderoo

poop & diapers

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Ohmys... Ohmyskittles

I agree! Posting those photos once or twice is fine but when it's all you post, it's not funny anymore. It gets gross after awhile.



nonmember avatar Cara

I disagree with you on the food face one. I love that one every time. Then again, I've never been bothered by food all over the place as a little one learns to eat or just gets enthusiastic. The washcloth can wait until he's done. But, I'm bored of the baby 'bird' shots. In this instance, its truly just a finger; who cares?

i.hea... i.heart.nerds

I see nothing wrong with a child feeding themselves and ending up with spaghetti sauce all over their face. I think it is cute. Cake? Ditto!

Cloth diapered baby butts? Not cute at all. In fact the only things I can think are 1) future sumo wrestler or 2) the looks incredibly uncomfortable, bulky and unflattering.

MegTh... MegTheGem

Wow, The Stir is coming across (to me, at least) as being the Facebook Mom Photos Gestapo. So judgemental.

chell... chellyelizabeth

I think that look babies get right before they start wailing (you know the one, lip sticking out, furrowed brow) is too adorable. I can be so fed up with my twins' crying, but I see that face and I just can't help but smile! 

heave... heavenlybliss19

I'd rather see a child covered in their dinner than one of a kid flipping off the camera.  That's right up there with laughing at your kid for cussing.  It's not cute, it's not funny - it's teaching them bad behaviors.  That said, I see no problem with anyone posting any picture/update of their child.  A) it's their account.  If you don't like it, you can always "un-friend" them. 

bubbl... bubbleboo

I'm with you on the food face one. Makes me want to throw up - but then, I am very OCD about stuff like that!


 


And photographing poop? Who does that??

the4m... the4mutts

Poop and puke, yah, I agree. But foodface? Its just food. Chill out.

And I agree with the mom above who said the "facebook pic gustapo" or something like that.

I mean, if you're sick of someones posts, just unsubscribe or defriend them. Ones persons poop, is anothers laughter.

I wouldn't want to see it, but id just remove them from my news feed.

Stacy... StacyLynn74

My son was flipping the bird in one of his sonogram pictures....Hysterical. on the rest, I think if it's your child it's NEVER annoying no matter what they're doing and when it's someone elses it kind of gets old fast....as wierd as that sounds lol

nonmember avatar Jane

I post to please the out of town mother-in-law, not you. Food will be on baby's face on facebook for her to see. Facebook (and the rest of the world) wasn't made specifically for you, so you're gonna have to live with facebook or delete your account.

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