Vampire Babies Aren't Just for Bella & Edward

Kristen Stewart pregnant BellaBy now every Twi-hard on the planet has their fangs sharpened to get a good spot on line for Breaking Dawn: Part 1. But the Facebook posts that have surprised me have come from the anti-Twilight camp. A whole host of my friends say they're going just to see how a vampire baby is born! And I can't blame them . . . I'm hella curious how Bella's birth scene is going to go down.

But let's be real, America. I know that there will be plenty of ladies like me who haven't made it to a midnight show of anything since before the first trimester. We the exhausted Twilight moms of America shouldn't be left out on all this vampire baby loving! Good thing we don't have to . . .

Advertisement

I present to you everything you need to get your Breaking Dawn fantasies on at home so you have time to find a sitter to take in a matinee! Enjoy your own vampire baby without one single fang to your uterine lining:

vampire pacifier

Vampire Pacifier; $4.99 -- Think Geek

Simple but oh so useful! Take your babe from cranky to peaceful faster than a Cullen can take a car from 0 to 110. When your little monster gets to caterwauling, just stick this in their mouth and let them use their (not-so-pointy) chompers on a piece of orthodontic rubber while you giggle at their fake fangs.

Caution I Bite

Caution, I Bite T-shirt; $28 -- Vamplets

So your kid's the biter. It happens to the best spawn -- demon or otherwise. But cheek pinching old ladies in the supermarket will be wary of reaching in with their germ-infested hands if there's a disclaimer right on your toothsome tot's t-shirt. Consider this warning your new shopping pal.

vampire leg warmers

Vampire Leg Warmers; $9 -- BModDesigns

When baby's as cold as a Cullen, it's a sign they need a pair of leg warmers to bring some life back into those little appendages. Not as good as wolf fur, but it will do.

Will you be watching Breaking Dawn just to see how they manage the birth scene or are you a true Twi-Hard?

 

Top Image via YouTube

Read More >